Hey Carlos, Sorry About the Booing and Stuff

Posted on July 25, 2008 by romanwarhelmet

Dear Carlos Delgado,
Hey Carlos, it’s me Roman. Yeah, you know that guy who… ummm…you don’t like too much. Listen, I don’t blame you. I said really nasty things. Like the time I told you I wished a stray bomb from Vieques would have hit you, that was cold. We shouldn’t [...]

Filed under: Open Letter | Tagged: , , , | 3 Comments »

Silly Accusations

Posted on July 21, 2008 by romanwarhelmet

Over the weekend, a delirious Nick P threw some slanderous and malicious comments towards the Mets. Now this is to be expected from Nick since, well, he is just that type of dude. He has done this in the past. Anyone, who links twice to Hitler has a few issues. Now, Nick sometimes [...]

Filed under: Stupid post | Tagged: , , , , , | 12 Comments »

America: Fuck Yeah

Posted on July 4, 2008 by romanwarhelmet

I have just witnessed something so tremendous, so transcendent that I am still at a bit of a loss for words. I just saw the first ever overtime eat-off in the Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog competition. Kobeyashi vs Chestnut. And who came out on top you ask? Joey Chestnut. American. [...]

Filed under: Non-MLB | Tagged: , , , , | No Comments »

Chase Utley and Jay Bruce Are Sabotaging My Team

Posted on June 22, 2008 by Hef

Readers familiar with the site are undoubtedly aware of certain man crushes for certain phenoms who are responsible for causing the “homosexuality?” tag to grow and grow till it dwarfed the players it represented.
But in the last week, these two have combined to go 3 for 47 for a BA of .064.  They’ve combined for [...]

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Breaking News: Karma is a Bitch

Posted on June 20, 2008 by romanwarhelmet

We here at Major League Jerk are ahead of the curve when it comes to breaking news.  On June 3rd, we broke the story of Wayne Krivsky’s desire to bring Major League Baseball it’s first all gay franchise.  Well, he has succeeded in Cincinnati.  But for his efforts he was unceremoniously dumped.  Well, if you worried about [...]

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An Open Letter to David Wright

Posted on June 11, 2008 by romanwarhelmet

Hi David,
It’s me Roman. The reason I am writing this letter, besides the restraining order (I wasn’t peeping I was just making sure you were OK), is to let you know that I know it’s not your fault. This year is not your fault. The losing is not your fault. Don’t [...]

Filed under: Open Letter, Stupid post | Tagged: , | 14 Comments »

Quality Start: Moving on Up…

Posted on June 4, 2008 by Hef

…To the big time. To a deluxe apartment in the skkk-yyy. Moving on up, to the east side. We finally got a piece of the pie.
Sorry about that. I was channeling Joba Chamberlin before last night’s game. Wanna hear what he was singing after the game?
Nobody likes me, [...]

Filed under: Quality Start | Tagged: , , , , , , | 24 Comments »

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