As part of Major League Jerk’s investigative team, it is my responsibility to ask questions and follow leads wherever they may take me. Earlier this season, The Cincinnati Reds fired General Manager Wayne Krivsky, even though the team seemed to be on the upswing after he infused the team with young talent through the draft and through trades. This seemed peculiar to me so I decided to go about finding out the real reason for the firing. Through various sources I have learned he was fired not because of a slow start but because Krivsky’s true purpose was to make the Reds the first all gay baseball team in Major League history. I have unearthed Photographic evidence to prove my point. First Krivsky himself: Read the rest of this entry »

Corey Patterson hit lead off yesterday for the Reds. Again. For the 28th game. He responded just how you’d expect him to, going 0-8 with 3 strikeouts. He also had another waste of an at-bat with a sacrifice bunt. In total, he made 9 of the Reds 54 outs. Niner. Three innings worth of outs. Corey is now hitting .201/.242/.354 in 144 team killing at-bats. Corey isn’t the focus of today’s Why Dusty? Therefore, I’ll let Chad from Redleg Nation sum up the thoughts of Reds fans everywhere in re: Corey Patterson.

If Corey Patterson isn’t gone by Tuesday (or at least gone from the starting lineup for good), I quit. This is ludicrous. He’s the worst leadoff hitter in the major leagues, and if Dusty Baker thinks he’s a good leadoff hitter, then Baker is irretrievably clueless.

Setting Corey aside, let’s move on to the actual subject of this post. Read the rest of this entry »

Consider this: Adam Dunn is a 6′6″, 275 pound, good ol’ boy from Houston, Texas. He likes his women like he likes his fastballs: belt-high and tight. He drinks PBR from one of those beer can helmets while he fishes for electric eels on the Ohio River with his pet mountain lion, Roger. He’s a man’s man in every sense of the word. He is the Reds’ best (only?) power hitter, and he’s a veritable on-base machine. Today, thanks to Mr. Baker, he is also the 7th hitter in the Reds’ lineup.

In Unison: Why Dusty? Read the rest of this entry »

The man to the right is Corey Patterson. He is a terrible hitter overall (career OPS .711). But versus lefties, he’s even worse (career OPS of .652). So what does Dusty do today when the Reds faced Johan Santana, arguably the best left-hander of our generation (with all apologies to Randy Johnson)? Of course he starts him…and of course he bats him at lead-off.

In unison: Why Dusty? Read the rest of this entry »

Welcome to Part 1 of what will likely be a 505,871,niner34 part series that will be referred to as Why Dusty?

The Reds traded away one of the best young sluggers in the game this past offseason for Edinson Volquez because the team’s pitching has been mediocre to terrible over the last decade. So far Edinson has been one of the best pitchers in the National League, and he’s been able to make that trade look almost-even. He continued his strong play this afternoon in a start versus the Chicago Cubs. Check out EV’s line: 7 innings pitched, 4 hits, 10 Ks/4 BBs, 0 runs. Very solid.

Oops, I left out a few key pieces of information. Edinson threw 75 strikes to only 43 balls. Not a bad ratio, eh? Now let’s add those two numbers together to get EV’s pitch count: 118.

In unison: Why Dusty?

Please tell me you haven’t forgotten what happened to this guy and also this guy while on your watch. EV has shown a ton of promise so far this season. Why don’t you see if maybe you can keep his arm attached to his shoulder for a few years, or is that asking too much?

Source: Pic from thenastyboys