…because he signed with them.  Get it?  They lost.

Yes the Arizona Cardinals now have another young Quarterback on their roster backing up their other young inexperienced QB on their roster (Anderson will be backed up by a different young, inexperienced QB on their roster).

Anderson, 26, agreed to a deal worth $7.25 million, of which $3.25 million will be guaranteed. If he reaches maximum performance bonuses, the deal could be worth in excess of $18 million.

I don’t know if anyone thought the Cardinals Offensive Line was amazing (they’re okay) because of Kurt Warner’s high completion rate and all around greatness but this signing and Matt Leinart taking snaps behind center, will expose them for the average unit that they are.  They say that a good O-line will make an average QB look good.  Well a great QB can also make an average O-line look good.  The thing about Warner that was so praiseworthy was that he always knew what he was going to do with the ball based on how the defense was lined up.  He had a quick release to go along with those smarts which means the O-line didn’t have to provide that extra second of protection that good lines are capable of providing. Read the rest of this entry »

Quote:

“The fans are ruthless and don’t deserve a winner,” Anderson wrote Tuesday in a terse e-mail when asked for a reaction to being released. “I will never forget getting cheered when I was injured. I know at times I wasn’t great. I hope and pray I’m playing when my team comes to town and (we) roll them.”

Again with this?

Listen Tim Couch Kellen Winslow Braylon Edwards we’re not booing you because you’re from Michigan/want more money/get injured, we’re booing you because you suck, do you see?  We as Cleveland fans have a lot of pent up frustrations…everyone in the world thinks we’re slack jawed yokels hacking away in a city with no sun, breathing air that tastes like burning and crying ourselves to sleep every night because we still like Players Club jackets, but one thing that puts us over the edge is fucking bullshit scapegoating that WE as fans are the fucking problem.

Listen, Derek, Horse Balls, bubaloo…you were THE SINGLE WORST QUARTERBACK IN THE ENTIRE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE LAST YEAR.  I repeat…YOU, DEREK ANDERSON, WERE THE WORST QUARTERBACK IN THE ENTIRE NFL, behind such luminaries and gunslingers like Seneca Wallace, Alex Smith and Chad Henne.  What kind of drool bib wearing rubes do you think we would have to be to continue to support a guy who, in two seasons, had so thoroughly betrayed our trust with such a cavalcade of screen passes thrown to feet and a 3-yard slant thrown 3-yards behind?

And this isn’t confined to just here, as witnessed in Milton Bradley’s racially charged bitching out of a city that begins with C and rhymes with “hicago.”  This kind of shit happens seemingly two or three times per year from various athletes, and why?  First, why is it surprising?  Second, why do you think we’re booing after seeing your 50% completion rate or .240 batting average on the jumbo-tron?  It’s not that we don’t like you as people because we don’t know you as people…our only connection with you is what you do on your respective field of play, and when you shit all over that field of play, we’re not going to be happy. Read the rest of this entry »

A lot has been made of the Arizona Cardinals rough start to the postseason having lost Safety Antrel Rolle and Karlos Dansby to Free Agency, Anquan Boldin to trade and Kurt Warner to retirement. And while losing 4 key pieces isn’t the best way to start any offseason it’s hardly the end of the world.

The greatest loss of the bunch is Kurt Warner. Warner was the perfect fit for the offense as it was constructed last year. He’s a smart QB with a quick release who knows how to read the defense. Even with most NFL offenses moving away from smashmouth football, Warner was still one of the best at running a pass heavy offense. This loss alone is far more important than the rest of them combined.

Aside from Warner, the losses were all about cost. On defense they lost Rolle, a player who was once considered a bust at CB* before being moved to Safety, and Dansby who, while good, probably wasn’t worth $43M for a team that needs to improve their entire defense and could risk losing one of their linebackers which was their strongest defensive position. The Cards have already replaced Rolle with Kerry Rhodes and now can turn their focus to improving their secondary and defensive line. I’m guessing they draft a TE in the first round, a CB in the second and a few backup defensive pieces with the rest of their early picks. They need to do more than just fill one defensive hole and by not paying Dansby and Rolle they have the cash to do so.

Will the Cards miss Anquan Boldin? Read the rest of this entry »

As NFL free agency’s opening din dies down we can finally see who fucked up.

Why waste time?  Lets just dig in!

Dumb – Bears sign Julius Peppers: Nothing says smart deal like giving a guy with serious motivational issues additional media and fanbase pressure and enough money to ensure that his children’s children’s children will never have to motivate themselves ever again.

Dumber – Bears sign Chester Taylor: Before you get all pissed, this has nothing to do with Taylor the player.  Well, it partly does because, while great, Taylor is good for one back-crushing, dick punching brainfart per game, and when you’re 31 years old at a position where you don’t age well, well, I can think of better positions to invest $7 mil guaranteed…especially when you consider that Taylor’s nothing more than a part-timer.  But still…if this weren’t A FUCKING RUNNING BACK OVER 30, this would be a great signing…too bad it’s not.

Dumb – Jags sign Aaron Kampman: This is dumb because Kampman is way overrated whether he keeps his hand on the ground or is standing up in a 3-4.  Not a whole lot of insight there, but you get the gist.  Have fun watching opposing LT’s shove him 5 yards back every running play while he compiles sacks against the worst opponents in the most meaningless games and is completely invisible against quality competition!

Dumber – Lions sign Kyle VandenBosch: I like him but he’s old, injury prone and playing on a DL that’s got next to no talent.  These are not the kind of signings that turn your team around, Detroit. Read the rest of this entry »

While the bulk of the MLJ crew heads down to Mexico for the 2nd Annual Major League Jerkoff and Super Bowl Party, Intern Jace is covering the site.

Every week we try to come up with a really stupid thing that will never come true ever in a million years no matter what and then try to convince you that it could maybe happen.  We’re so edgy and contrarian.  There’s nothing we can do about it.  Plus everyone’s favorite thing about sports is defending the stupidest bar room claims, even when you’re sober!

Today’s topic?  Let’s make it so Quarterbacks can’t wear helmets anymore so that we can see their dreamy eyes and devilish smiles.

Consider the following:

• The NFL can’t compete with sports the NBA where such handsome devils go uncovered.
• Since 2001, the league has made it easier for offensive players to go unhit and has tightened penalties for roughing the passer.
• If we remove helmets from QBs and any concern that they might never get hit ever, scoring will go up.
• Scoring is what makes football interesting because then you don’t have to give any credit to a bunch of defensive players we’ve never heard of…and we’re lifelong Jets fans!

The more we think about it, we actually don’t think this idea is all that crazy.  In fact we’re on the phone with Roger Goddell right now!

While the bulk of the MLJ crew heads down to Mexico for the 2nd Annual Major League Jerkoff and Super Bowl Party, Intern Jace is covering the site.

We really have to hand it to SI columnist Jim Trotter who bravely tackled the subject matter of the weather at the Super Bowl this weekend, boldly proclaiming that the “Colts Have Weathered the Storm Before.”  And he’s right because when I think of Super Bowl teams who have dealt with weather related adversity I think of the Colts and their victory over the Bears in Super Bowl XLI.

No other team or city has had as many rain related issues as Indianapolis did back in 2007 when they became the first winners of a Super Bowl marred by inclement weather.  Tens of thousands of people were undeniably inconvenienced by winds as high as 5MPH.  There’s even anecdotes about a family of five that had to wait 25 minutes for assistance when they realized they had locked their keys in their car.

The issue of course is that it’s been raining in Miami this week.

The weather was so poor Monday the Saints had to move their practice indoors; the league also shifted Tuesday’s media day to an indoor concourse at Sun Life Stadium. Rain isn’t in the extended forecast — Sunday night is expected to be partly cloudy with a low near 52 degrees — but if three years ago taught us anything, it’s that Mother Nature should never be taken for granted.

Us couldn’t have said it better ourselves Jim!  Just when you think you’ve tamed Mother Nature either through creating domes or other tools that keep water out, she throws you a curve ball by raining on your expensive football game.  This is easily the most we’ve ever hated an act of nature before.

While the bulk of the MLJ crew heads down to Mexico for the 2nd Annual Major League Jerkoff and Super Bowl Party, Intern Jace is covering the site.

Are the Saints front office working behind closed doors to reward Quarterback Drew Brees for his play this year?  And if so, are they keeping it a secret because he may not live up to the hype?  It’s no secret that we’ve never been the biggest Drew Brees fans but we think it’s pretty obvious to every unbiased observer that Drew Brees isn’t worth the money.  He didn’t even make the Pro Bowl this year!

And why is it so hush hush?  Is it because he’s a white quarterback in a predominantly black city?  Is this a ploy by the front office to force their agenda down the throats of their fans?  We’ll keep you updated as more news filters in via email links.

It appears that nobody wants to win this goddamn thing.  Everybody just wants to lose it.  And other sports cliches. Here’s the original post for all of you who are thinking about bitching.

Remember, you get one point for a correct first round pick, two for second round, three for third, and five for the Super Bowl. Since both of my picks are out of the playoffs, I hang my head in shame.

The Leaderboard: Read the rest of this entry »

Ahhhhh. The scent. The taste. The texture. The way it settles. There is nothing finer that a Brett Favre Season Killing Interception. There are many vintages of the Season Ending Pick. They are truly like a fine wine, everyone has a favorite. My personal favorite is the 2007. I am sure many in Louisiana and Wisconsin may be partial to the 2009. Read the rest of this entry »

Before I left for Tucson this morning I realized, you know what I haven’t done in awhile?  Highlight the stupidity of the commentariat.  That shouldn’t take long.

When we last left our playoff pickem, the MLJ crew was whomping y’alls asses and you were like, “no, don’t hurt us” and we was all like “how else we gonna knock that stupid out ya?”  Yeah, that was tight.*

Remember, you get one point for a correct first round pick, two for second round, three for third, and five for the Super Bowl.  Since both of my picks are out of the playoffs, I hang my head in shame.

The Leaderboard: Read the rest of this entry »