Only one game was scheduled for the day today, but it was a biggie between the Twins and Tigers. The game was tied at 1 after 9 innings, at which point the Twins scored 2 in the top of the 10th. My man Curtis Granderson led off the bottom of the 10th with a solo shot, but Joe Nathan got the next three Tiger batters out in succession to hold on for the 3-2 win. The Tigers lead is down to 1 in the AL Central with Game 2 of the day/night double header to be played later tonight.

Say it with me……

FUCK THE TWINS!

Tigers 3, Indians 0 (top of 8): Nate Robertson got the start for Detroit, so I figured this to be a sure win for Cleveland. Apparently I don’t know shit about anything. Robertson pitched 6 innings without giving up a run. Chicago native Curtis Granderson hit his 26th HR leading off the bottom of the 1st inning.

Mets 0, Rockies 0 (just started): Jason Marquis is still looking for his 15th win. That sentence all by itself is enough to make me question life.

Cardinals 2, Brewers 1 (top of 5): John Smoltz is continuing his domination since being demoted.

White Sox 1, Cubs 0 (top of 5): This is a makeup game from a rainout way back on June 16th, back when the average price of milk was $2.19 and when Hef still had balls. At the time, both teams were still considered threats in their respective divisions to make the playoffs. Now, not so much. This game no longer means shit.

EDIT: it’s still the top of the 8th in Detroit but Cleveland has tied it at 3.

/doesn’t give a shit
//oh wait yes I do. Go Cleveland!

Only one game is being played with the lights off today and it’s at Wrigley between the Cubs and Pirates. The Cubs scored 4 runs in the 1st and 10 in the 2nd, but then were held scoreless in the 3rd. What a bunch of choking chokers. They currently lead 14-2, but since they’re so bad at baseball, I fully expect the final score to be within single digits. I have no faith in their ability to keep a double-digit lead.

In other news around the league, the Red Sox made a trade with the Reds for shortstop Alex Gonzalez. I’m not sure what the fuck for.

I’ll see you all soon in UTL.

We have no day games to speak of on this lazy Friday afternoon, so instead I’m going to give you some news and notes from around the league. I figure that if a real baseball blog could do it, so could we. I’m just going to give you the news and notes. All educated commentary thereafter will have to come from you, the reader.

• The Oakland A’s have released Jason Giambi. At this point, his career has two different options: he can hang it up quietly and live off the money he’s already made, or he can find a GM to give him some more money who thinks he can be a valuable bat off the bench during the stretch run even though he can barely walk. It could go either way, really.
• The Yankees acquired pitcher Chad Guadin from the Padres in exchange for PTBNL. Gaudin will be used primarily out of the bullpen for NY while PTBNL will go from the Yankees AA team to San Diego’s.
• The Twins acquired pitcher Carl Pavano from the Indians in exchange for PTBNL. Isn’t it odd that two teams would have a guy with the same name? Is this joke doing anything for you? I didn’t think so. I like the pickup for the Twins though. Pavano has dominated the White Sox and Tigers this year. Oops, that was commentary. Sorry ’bout that.
• MLB.com is reporting that the Pirates have signed their 8th round pick in June’s amateur draft for over $1.1 million. That’s approximately $1.1 million over the recommended slot. I can’t wait to see how that plays out in Bud Selig’s office.
• Bobby Jenks is fat.

I’ll see you in a bit with UTL.

We haven’t done one of these in a while, but with four games being played currently on getaway day, I figured we’d bring it back.

NOTE: As far as you know, I would still be updating you if my favorite team from Chicago weren’t winning 5-0 or if their in-division rivals from Detroit weren’t losing 2-0.

Cleveland 5, Toronto 4: This game just went final. I’m not sure what the Blue Jays should be most embarrassed about: losing to an AL Central team, losing to the worst AL Central team, or allowing Kerry Wood to pitch a perfect 9th. I know which direction I’m leaning though.

Seattle 2, Detroit 0: It’s the top of the 8th in Detroit. Jarrod Washburn has allowed 2 hits through 7 IP. More impressive than that is how he’s held Marcus Thames hitless in 3 at bats. It’s how legends are made.

San Francisco 1, Atlanta 1: A battle of two teams fighting for the NL wildcard. /doesn’t give a shit

Chicago 5, Tampa Bay 0: It’s only the top of the 7th, so it’s too early to mention it, but as I type this, Mark Buehrle is 30 years old. FYI.

Sorry, busted wordpress isn’t letting me add pictures, but let me assure you, the one I wanted to use was freaking epic.*

* it may or may not have been epic

Only one day game is on the MLB schedule for today. The Twins are in Chicago for the opening game of an interleague weekend against the Cubs at Wrigley. Since it’s the only game that’s currently going on, I will provide a crazy amount of detail that no human being would care to read.

Everything I do, I do it for you. /New Found Glory’d

Starting pitchers today are Randy Wells for the Cubs and Kevin Slowey for the Twins. Wells was making his 7th start on the season. He came into the day 0-2, but a sparkling 1.86 ERA. Slowey came in 8-2 with a 4.21 ERA in 12 starts. Read the rest of this entry »

There’s 6 games either going on right now or already completed, so you’d think we would have published the Day Baseball Update like an hour ago. However, our beloved Editor in Chief told us to hold off for a bit. Personally I think that was the wrong direction*, but I’m not a decision-maker around here. I just do what I’m told when I’m told to do it.

* Has this joke received enough mileage yet?

Some scores for you: Read the rest of this entry »

Normally Mondays are the best day of the MLJ week because we’ve had all weekend to think about posts and get them ready.  But today?  Today is slow because we’re all busy as shit and there’s nothing we or you can do about it.  Especially we.  In lieu of thoughtful commentary or dramatic works featuring Joe Flacco we present to you an update on something that you can get all on your own.  You’re welcome.

• The Tigers have a 2-1 lead on the White Sox in a battle of AL Central heavy weights teams.  Galaragga and Richard are really bringing the heat today.  Oh boy, I can’t get enough of that AL Central magic.  AL Central: Catch the fever!  (but wear a surgical mask and latex gloves while attending the actual games–trust me).
• The Cardinals and the Rockies are tied up at 1 in the fourth inning of what will surely go down in history as the greatest National League game of the day played before 7pm EST.  I know I should insult the Rockies the same way I insult the AL Central but really, what’s the point?

While watching the White Sox on offense so far this year, I can’t help but think of my favorite groundskeepers. It used to be that on days when they were scheduled to go up against a good pitcher [like Halladay yesterday], I’d just call it a loss before the game even started and move on. Now I’m doing that even when they’re facing guys like Scott Bleeping Richmond.

Solid team, Kenny Williams. Solid team.

The Blue Jays are currently leading 2-0 in the 8th. The game was wrapped up in the 2nd when Kevin Millar hit a solo shot to left center.

EDIT: Jim Thome likes to make me look foolish. I hit “publish” and he ties it with a 2-run HR with 2 outs in the 8th right after Jermaine Dye beat out a rocketing infield single. Don’t worry, they’ll blow it in the 9th.

What’s up office jockeys? How’s the wall of your cube looking today? Probably not as nice as the view of the rainy weather in upstate NY that I see through the window in my living room. Enough of my bragging about unemployment, let’s check out what’s going on in the Sport of Kings and Domincans this afternoon.

I’ll just shift my eyes a few inches and read the handy do-hickey and… WHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAA!?!? Oh snap! There’s something wrong with the score-ma-jig!

TRAINA! Read the rest of this entry »