So I read this after the awesomest Mexican trip in the history of Mexican trips and my cheery, albeit tired mood instantly takes a turn for the worse.
The Indians are looking at Jermaine Dye?
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO, a million fucking times NO.
I swear to LeBron, if Dye is signed, this will be the last straw. The final straw in my Indians fanhood. I mean it…I’ll abandon the Tribe and move to a team that actually gives a shit. It’s not just that Dye is awful (because, as a baseball player, he could be worse), it’s that if the Indians sign him, they’ll be waving a white flag to the rest of the American League that they’re simply not interested in winning.
Yea, fuck giving that money to Cy Young caliber pitchers like CC Sabathia or Cliff Lee, what we need is an aging, slow moving, power hitter with iffy power getting $10+ mil for a season’s worth of work that will no doubt end with him shutting it down with an incredibly questionable injury. This is the only possible scenario.
Stats aside (and that’s saying a lot about a guy who threw up a .179/.293/.297 after the All Star break), performance aside, skill set aside…Jermaine Dye should still be considered unsignable. Why? Because he’s a straight up faggot, that’s why. Dye is one of the biggest piles of shit in all of MLB. He’s a straight up douchebag. He likes meat in his seat, wears his keys on the right, and really, I’m not sure he’d even be able to sign a contract considering he has dick in his hands at all times of the day.
Fuck Jermaine Dye.
Dolans…consider this a warning. If you even HINT about making a move regarding Jermaine Dye, not only will I become a Yankees fan, I will spend every single waking hour making sure that the worst kind of vitriol is spewed all across the Interwebs. I will stage protests. I will throw Molotov cocktails at the Jake Prog. You do not want to cross me, Dolans, by forcing Shapiro to sign Jermaine Dye.
Consider this your warning.
please say it ain’t so. i’ll join you on the yanks bandwagon…
needs more over the top
The Yankees are a good team to support since they signed Marcus MVP Thames.
I knew this was coming.
sounds like he would have fit right in on the mecksiko trip.
Wait, what? Is it July already? [checks calendar] No, it’s still only February. A little early for spencer’s annual “I hate the Indians and I’m never rooting for them again” tangent isn’t it?
jermaine dye is bizarro marcus thames.
Needs more obese pasty white guys.
Is it racist if I say that Jermaine Dye looks like TO in that picture?
no because he does.
I think he looks like Bo.