- What the fuck are “Paolo Points”, kid?
Kids, it’s that time of year when being naughty or nice can really pay off in spades. Santa Claus, citing the poor economy, has cancelled his annual stopover at the Casa Del Major League Jerk, but did sext me a list of people that we should each buy a gift for. I’m going to call this a [fingerquote] Gift Exchange™ [/fingerquote].
I thought I’d set some ground rules for said Gift Exchange™:
Spending limit is $20-30, not including shipping.
Must be well thought out.
Spence must receive an [insert shitty chain restaurant] Gift Card. (done.)
Each recipient will write a post, and provide a pic of gift in use (what could go wrong), with a winner for best gift declared by you, the readers.
If someone sends Hef a set of prosthetic balls, the giver to Hef’s receiver will automatically be declared the winner.
FYI, for you West Coast worker bees, after the jump, a scantily clad gal.
From the official Name Drawing web site of Major League Jerk:
sharpy BUYS FOR roman.
crm BUYS FOR hef.
nickp BUYS FOR stigs.
clown BUYS FOR gonzo.
spence BUYS FOR rex.
rex BUYS FOR crm.
hef BUYS FOR sharpy.
stigs BUYS FOR spence.
gonzo BUYS FOR clown.
roman BUYS FOR nickp.
Roman’s TwitPic to Santa (”Insert Into Post” has a whole new meaning)
Commenters, feel free to give ideas based on how well you know us, or just bitch and moan because you weren’t included (I’m looking at you, Triston).
Tonight’s TV:
NBA: Probably on. Check local listings. /doesn’t give a shit
MLB: The Gonzo Memorial Scoreboard indicates an apparent lack of baseballing action tonight.
College Hoops: Texas vs. West Carolina (?) and The Butler Peen Gobblers vs. Northwestern
Funny Show: Modern Family (Rerun of the hot, new neighbor, aka The Bicycle Lesson and a new episode)
Intern Jace’s TV Pick: The Cast of Party of Five: Where Are They Now (TV Guide Channel)
Rex’s Google Tip o’ the Day: Search “Peen Gobblers”.
Tonight’s eye candy:
Hug and kiss your moms for me. /fin.
The ef is sharpy?
I love this idea! Wait! So who do I buy for and who buys for me? I don’t see my name.
[slowly lowers head] Oh.
Nevermind then. This was a stupid idea anyway.
You are. Yeah, you.
/points at Happy and says it like Jake Ryan to Samantha Baker Davis, Jr. at the end of Sixteen Candles
//high-fives CoRM
Fuck this list. It’s the commenters that make this site. I’m the IrishMafia of this site.
/
crying uncontrollably
//
looks up and sees a reference that was asked not be made
///
throws Hef’s Nerf Turbo in the toilet
Was the toilet empty when you threw it in there? Who cares I can clean it off.
/hey guys, did you see my new Nerf Turbo?
Hef, Santa is skippin the compound because its not a christian compound
/
Santas in the bible
how do you put a picture of a smoking hot chick with huge titties and not provide a name for me to google?
/throws away sweater for rex.
Nothing for Intern Jace huh?
Ark. Not work friendly
Commenters helping commenters
thanks triston.
/digs sweater out of trash.
She sure has a large pubic bone.
Whats that red dot on there?
/Hernia’d
What should I buy Happy for [whatever Holiday that douche celebrates]?
/trick question–I already ordered it
//pwnd
Free Paolo!
I already have NickP’s gift all picked out. It will rawk!
/by Rawk I mean it will fall within the $20-$30 window before shipping
this is easily the greatest thing ever said on this website.
my work is auditing my checking account, so rexy…sorry to tell you that you’re not getting german bbq porn for christmas.
$20 will buy 20 clues.
wow…that topped the nerf turbo.
dare i say…this thread’s gone
plaidepic?/spaceballs’d
Jamario! Moon is the tit’s meow.
Your work? Really? I’m assuming you pay for your weed by Visa, or some kind of sexual barter.
straight cash, homey.
Is someone in the company stealing?
Oh, and Rex, Modern Family isn’t a repeat. There’s a repeat on, but an hour later there’s also a new episode.
/
sticking up for Rex (?)
hey, weirdest thing but i got a christmas card that says “we will never like you. signed, The MLJ crew” it is like you guys stole my christmas list.
You weren’t supposed to open that until Christmas.
well when i saw that the envelope was sealed with a middle finger sticker i just couldnt wait.
Butler is gonna whup Northwestern
If there’s more than what I already have, society is in a very, very bad place.
Hef, fuck you.
/high-fives NicholasP
They’d better. The line was only 4.5 so I jumped on it.
where do you dabble in the ol’ ambling-gay, Triston?
I use sportsbetting.com
So, uh, what’s up with the whole page being center justified?
I don’t see that. On what browser? Navigator?
Our most tech savvy “writer” was in charge of tonight’s post. So of course it’s going to look funny.
Ever had any problems with payouts?
IE7
Was like that on my office computer too. Movie was off. Then on my Home computer it was back to normal. Movie back on.
Pay-outs?
I haven’t taken one yet but I have seen that it takes awhile. But I think most do. The big problem I had with other sites was that my bank would reject them when I tried to deposit.
Weird thing is, when I was at work, it wasn’t that way, and now, it is. And I’m using the same laptop. Anyway, how did Nick know that Pao Pao got the bannin’ two hours ago? Is there a special mailing list for people on the Island of Misfit Commenters?
IE7? Well there’s your problem.
/pushes glasses up nose
//snorts
no, and I would know. what did Paolo do?
I don’t have admin priveleges on my work laptop, and it’s a pain in the ass going to helpdesk just to get a new browser.
Just being his usual charming self. It got a little ugly the other day when somebody joked about being a Notre Dame alum, and he said something today that could be interpreted as threatening.
We have no information about that event nor could we provide any insight had we that information in the first place. Further inquiries into that matter must be sent to our lawyer, J. W. Jewenstein.
Thanks,
The Management
Young Lefty -
I am writing you for a favor. In the next installment of Ballin could you post “Dwight Howard hates America.” Followed by this clip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47VLce11WDM?
I was just referencing this:
In reference to this. (comment 66)
Like I said, I have no knowledge about that.
/winks
They still make that?? I thought that was an old interweb wives tale.
/taps cane
Wait, why did NickP and Hef get banned?
And Clarence, I’d love to do that (Lord knows I can’t stand irish), but that would definitely score me a banishment.
Damn, I thought Hef was the only one here without nuts
+1
I have nuts. And they work better now than they ever did.
What up fags?
That’s not very nice.
I miss you losers but goddamn life is good right now. I have a new respect for life.
After only 3 days at work?
Yea I know. Its unreal.
So how mad would you be Hef? (#77)
Wow, that’s the most retarded comment I’ve ever seen. Doesn’t he realize that NickP and I are the same person?
And how is working for Sheriff Joe?
That would be awesome. Irish would have an online heart attack.
Fuck Irish. And which one of you fags talks intimately with TBL about Hef?
What am I missing? Is there drama in blog land?
TBL just tried to be funny on his site when people brought up Nick and Hef’s banning. Shockingly, he failed.
/sincere
Sparty link?
I’m actually surprised he hasn’t given me the ol’ heave ho yet.
NickP does.
Brainsplosion!
comment 91
i know Irish emails TBL about people. Hell, he has asked for me to be banned in the comment section because I said that a post that TBL wrote was retarded and only meant for pageviews. I think the one about Tressel never being able to win the big game.
I should probably quit arguing directly with TBL about Notre Dame. I do enjoy miz’s barbs, though.
I speak to Jason (that’s what I call him in our e-mails) often about Hef, and what Hef does and our hopes and dreams. How someday we will merge into a superblog and then make lots of money and how totally Gay Avatar looks*
*That is the only thing I think I have agreed with him on ever
TBL is scared to argue with Miz.
The Big Jerk? Major League Lead?
Roman- Ross is already taking reps at that other position when the media gets kicked out.
Sparty…He will be the Safety on all definitive passing downs
/Roman’s source
They also mailed out the seating assignments for the new stadium today…everyone will have by Thanksgiving
can’t wait to see where my sons first year of college placed me.
Loved how he avoided evry idea you had to settle his ‘challenge’ with Miz. Miz ownes him.
He told me one day that I was on the “bitch list”. I’d feel bad for the poor fella if he wasn’t such a dick.
he has some social disorder. he tried to defend the magic considering AI then everyone, me mostly, got on his case about it. he then played it off like he was joking.
At least we know it’s not a social anxiety disorder. Cause that’s myth.
+1
Was that today? I was pretty busy today, couldn’t make the usual rounds. Carter and Iverson on the same team would be must see TV.
There’s a high probability that one or both of them would remove one shoe and sit in the middle of the court like the dude in Royal Tennenbaums.
in the am round up today.
fuck it, i’ll do it tomorrow.
/never scared
I just read the Notre Dame thread. I am speechless. I am without speech.
Good thing you can type then.
/doesn’t get it
//Arizona State sucks
///Oregon>Arizona
////in the lazy AZ currently
You going to the game?
Which one? There is about 4 Notre Dame threads a day.
Doesn’t get it? What kind of meme is that? It’ll never catch on.
/doesn’t give a shit
Bryan, start here. http://thebiglead.com/?p=28751#comment-580186
Oh wow. I posted the wrong link. It’s in the Mangino thread from today.
what is it with you and fixin’ fucking sandwiches?