We here at Major League Jerk are not immune to the emotional aspect of the game of baseball. Sure, we’re not a bunch of whining, crying homos like most of our readership but we are still able to recognize an emotional experience when one comes along. As such, the entire MLJ staff was moved when they learned that, with the exception of Satchel Paige who was kept out because of racism instead of important reasons, Tim Wakefield is the oldest first time All-Star ever. Yes, at age 42, Wakefield puts to shame the achievements of Jaime Moyer (age 40, 2003) and Connie Marrero (age 40, 1951) who’s ability to be overlooked for a large portion of their career was not as great as Wake’s. It’s a testiment to Timmy’s endurance, stamina, and ability to capitalize on the fact that hitters aren’t using steroids anymore that should be passed down from generation to generation.
From all of us here at MLJ, we salute you, Tim Wakefield. You honor us with your excellence.
Hef, congrats! By clicking on this post, I just knocked City of Champs out of the 9 hole on my Chrome start page and replaced it with MLJ. Barring a Woot-off, you could bypass Woot by tomorrow’s Nothing to Click Here. Good luck catching Yahoo Personals 40 and Over page.
i bought my espresso maker on woot.com
/no i didn’t
after watching how long niekro threw for, and what wakefield is now doing, i am so teaching my kid the knuckleball.
I just bought a Roomba last week from Woot.
/continuing my plunge into a life of sloth.
The tears in my eyes are about to spill over.
/goes back to remembering the simpler times of when Rex was dead
Between throwing a knuckleball and being a punter in the NFL, there are plenty of jobs for rich white kids who want to make sligthly more than they would if they went to law school.
add long snapper to that list.
which is why i never understood why Jeff Feagles ever considered retirement 3 years ago.
LIST!!!
DID SOMEONE SAY LIST!?!?!?!?!?1
lemme on that train!!!
Career Longevity:
Tour Golfer > Knuckleballer > Ron Jeremy’s Fluffer > Long Snapper > Backup QB > MLJ “Writer”
There’s a mental picture I didn’t need in the morning
MLJ “Writers” have shorter shelf lives than coal miners.
This post reeks of Duffy….
What the hell Hef?
I think the Craig Krenzel 3rd string QB route is the best option. That is, unless of course, you’re drafted by the Bears wherein Craig Krenzel is a 1st Team talent.
FML
how dare you speak of saint krenzel in such derogatory terms? HOW DARE YOU?
i demand you light yourself on fire as penance.
I’ll arise from the dead if the assignment desk tells me it wants 600 words on MLJ Salutes: Ron Jeremy’s Fluffer
Give the coffin some room, people! It’s about to open!
I was watching some of Steelers/Giants from 2004, Week 15 on NFL Network and they showed a stat that Craig Krenzel was the only other rookie QB besides Ben to win a start at that point in the season.
A baptism in the Cuyahoga would kill two birds with one stone.
Burn on, big river, burn on….
jonathon adler forgot to add the /jmorris tag to the cuyahoga link.
Randy Newman is a pimp
Yes he is. Dayton, Ohio 1903 is the jam.
Do I have to listen to Musburger yell “HOLY BUCKEYE!” as I do it?
is this a knock on uncle brent? in addition to forsaking saint krenzel?
oh man…there’s no hope for salvation for you. all the hail mary’s in the world couldn’t save you from the eternal burn.