Every year we have complaints about All-Star voting but we usually wait until it’s over with to complain. This year, I’m trying to be more proactive with my complaints so that maybe it’ll have some effect. So I’ve decided, instead of ridiculing the fans who vote, I’m going to try to understand them better in order to persuade them to vote differently.
Here are the following reasons I understand that people vote for a player for the All-Star game. I’m not saying I condone these reasons but these are reasons I understand:
- The best player on their favorite team
- The best player at that position in the entire league
- A once great player who is past his prime at that position
- A player who has received a lot of hype lately
- A player from a popular team at a specific position
- The worst player at a position (I do this for fun)
- An outstanding player on a team that just won the World Series
- The best player on a team that is currently in first place
- Every member of your favorite team
- (Women) voting for someone because he’s attractive
Some of these voter types will never be rectified. You will have trouble convincing elderly, female season ticket holders not to vote for everyone on their team or the dumbest of diehards. There is a reason guys like Chris Young get even a single vote each year. It’s because some people just won’t stop voting for their entire favorite team.
Also, I understand people voting for Ken Griffey Jr. who is no longer a good baseball player. He was once the thing of legend and he has name recognition. He falls into quite a few categories actually. So I can understand scrolling through a ballot, seeing his name early (we should talk about the ballot name ordering) and voting for him. Likewise, I get it when Jimmy Rollins gets a lot of votes to start at shortstop. I don’t agree with it since he’s the worst offensive shortstop in the NL right now, but I understand it. His team just won a World Series and he was MVP a few years back (really?) so there’s a lot of name recognition involved.
Having said all that, I’m leading a campaign to stop an All-Star error from happening before it’s too late. I know this isn’t the most egregious of All-Star voting fuck ups, but I felt compelled to call forth to All-Star voters in the last few weeks: stop voting for Mark Teixeira over Kevin Youkilis.
Let’s examine the rationale for voting for Mark Teixieira:
1. He’s the first basemen for the Yankees.
Listen, I understand that the Yankees are a popular team and they have a lot of fans, but for all of you people out there who are voting for Mark Teixeira just because you recognize his name or are voting for him because you think he’s the best first basemen in the AL, let me tell you something, you’re making a mistake.
Kevin Youkilis is definitely the better choice. He’s got a higher on base percentage, an equal slugging percentage, and he’s a much better defensive first basemen. Also, let’s not forget that Tex’s slugging percentage is inflated because he’s got that short porch in Yankee Stadium to pad his numbers with. The one category he leads Youk in is HRs which should really be ignored this year due to the fact that the Yankees play in the league’s most embarrassing stadium, right?
I also imagine some of you lesser fans and women are voting for his pretty face. Please don’t. That face has no character. You want character, vote for this.
You want reasons to vote for Youk based on the list?
- He’s the best offensive player on the best team in baseball.
- He’s the best overall player at his position in the AL both offensively and defensively
- Name recognition? His name’s Youk.
- He’s got a WS ring and a share from 2004–What’s Tex got besides four different teams under his belt already and a reputation as a gun for hire?
All-Star voters, let me reason with you. Many wrongs are committed in the voting process each year. Don’t let this be one of them. Be smart. Vote Youk.
This message was brought to you by the committee to re-elect Kevin Youkils.




I thought this was going to be an actual post. It turned out to be Red Sox propaganda.
/Vote for Miggy Cabrera
Adam Jones, Nick Markakis, Brian Roberts should all be starters.
/homer’d
//Sorta really believe it
That Youk guy sure is ugly.
Also, wasn’t he out of a few games due to a ruptured vahjeen?
Oops, accidentally deleted Worley’s bid for Raburn.
Please note for the record.
Marcus Thames should be voted in at every position including pitcher.
i’ll vote for tex over youk any day for these reasons:
1. watching youk play baseball is painful…it’s like watching trey anastasio play guitar. it sounds ok, but it looks like they’re getting rectal exams.
2. tex may be an asshole, but at least he’s a classy asshole.
3. goatees are gay
As a Yankees fan do you find it hard to root for the guys who come up through the Yanks farm system? Is it hard for you to root for someone making less than $18M/year?
i believe it was an arthroscopic hysterectomy.
Why did my comment get TBL’d? You probably fear the Raburn. If I cant comment here, where can I go.
/
I gots no where else to go
//
Wayne’s World 2′d
You forgot a reason Hef. Player that is good on their fantasy team.
I voted for Aaron Hill for that reason.
/he’s actually good this year
Not my fault Youk has a shitty agent.
I already voted the maximum amount of times for Chris Davis.
i voted for jeremy sowers…
to get shot on the mound.
I voted for Tex for the same reason I voted for Varitek. They played college ball at Georgia Tech, and I’m a homer. I feel that this is acceptable.
I voted because I think its cool to make holes out of the little bubbles.
/doesn’t give a shit
/RedSawx are ghey
Youk is playing like a fagot right now he needs to turn it and spend less time a gay bars.
False. You are.
/sick burn
“He’s the best overall player at his position in the AL both offensively and defensively”
Justin Morneau, Youk is gayer than this.
Youk has a higher OBP, SLG and is better with his glove. Morneau is good but he’s no Youk.
Mark Reynolds > youk
Yeah, and he’s Canadian. But that Youk beard, honestly, just awful.
Agreed. It reminds me of Philadelphia.
Philadelphians’ beards are much, much more spotty.