Quality Start: My Donations Paid Off

Good morning fellow jerks and racists/sexists. I must say I am looking forward to greatness today and I am certain we will deliver the goods. I would love to tell you that I spent my evening watching sports but instead I actually spent it physically exerting myself. I went to the gym. OK, Monkeykong stop laughing. On my journey to a better and thinner me, I have managed to skip this crucial weight loss step. I have done stupid things, like Wii Fit but it is time to get serious and I went back. I have been paying money to my gym since 2005. I haven’t gone in two and a half years. During that time, I paid $25 a month. Actually $50, Mrs. Roman also has a membership but she goes sporadically, so it sort of kinda pays. I essentially donated my fat tax to the place. My thought process was that I would never find a gym membership that cost effective. So, I spent about $750 of unused months just to keep that sweet deal. I am a financial wizard.

Since my departure from the gym, it doubled in size. It added another Cardio area, a full area of Universal weights, a Spin class room, and another classroom. I would like to think I helped pay for it. So to the muscle bound assholes and hot girls with very tight Heinies, you’re welcome. The RomanWarHelmet Memorial Wing was a small thing I could do for you to look good and be healthy. While I was getting my ass in gear (down 78LBs so far on my journey) here are some of the happenings from the sporting world last night:

Knicks 109 FraudHawks 105: David Lee had another double-double with 13pts and 14 rebounds. Larry Hughes had 23pts and Al Harrington was 20 and 10. Al Horford had 20 and 13. Each team had 6 guys in double figures scoring wise. I hope the Knicks will lose a bit more. The playoffs do them no good this year. Get in the Lottery, Get another piece. Make the playoffs next year. You don’t have a draft pick then anyway, thanks to Isiah. I am certain Donnie Walsh will kneecap somebody for this to happen.

Fraudtics 115 Nets 111: Who needs KG when you have Kendrick Perkins giving you 17pts and 13 boards? Well, they do since they only beat the Nets. Vince Carter had 34pts in a loss. Typical. Devin Harris had 25pts and 11 assists. Paul Pierce had 31 pts. I find it funny that the Nets have good talent and a shitty coach. Lawrence Frank is doing his best to make a possible playoff team into a Lottery Team. Donnie Walsh should have Mike D’Antoni pay attention.

Heat 135 Suns 129: Shaq’s tour of his Florida homes continued with a showdown with the last team he piggybacked a title off of. He had 22pts and 8 boards and renewed life in the Alvin Gentry Era. Nash had 29pts and 10 assists. It was all naught. Dwayne Wade was filthy sick. He had 35pts and 16 assists. A superstar that makes his teammates better. A novelty to those west of the Mississippi.

Cavs 91 Bucks 73: LeBron had 23pts in this first round Eastern Conference playoff preview. I am pumped.

College Basketball happened. Click this if you must.

Hockey had two games if you want those scores.

Break’d News: Cowboys cut TO. More later after I stop laughing.