Good morning, beautiful readers of the greatest website in the Kingdom of Everdom. Sunday marked Clown’s unofficial halfway-point of the NBA season – the point at which teams start taking things semi-seriously instead of the full-on halfassitude that prevails during the first half of the season. Now is when teams will start jostling for playoff position, whether it’s finishing a couple of games under .500 to get that 8th playoff spot, like in the Eastern Conference, or finishing with 50 wins, which is what it will take in the Western Conference to make the playoffs. Let me tell you about some of the doings yesterday in the NBA, or you can just read about how Chris Brown beat up Rihanna.
Spurs 105, Celtics 99: San Antonio beat Boston at their own game, which is stifling defense with a mixture of ho-hum offense. However, the Spurs were able to out-ho hum the Celtics on their way to a dominating, punishing win in Boston. This was the team with the 2nd best record in the West going up against the team with the 2nd best record in the East, on ABC no less, and taking care of business. Tim Duncan had a double double and Clown’s fantasy beast Matt Bonner had 23 points. The Celtics had 5 players hit double digits, but it wasn’t near enough. Pretty much shows me that West > East, but that’s a small sample size, so….
Lakers 101, Cavaliers 91: A flu-ridden Kobe Bryant came out and Willis Reed’d his team to a victory over the team with the best record in the Eastern Conference, in the place where they had previously been unbeaten (against admittedly meager competition). Even at 50%, Bryant was able to go 8-17 from the field and perfect from the foul line. His playing through severe illness was so inspiring that Lamar Odom went absolutely beastmode on Cleveland, going for 28 points and 17 rebounds. Future Global Icon LeBron James had 16 points on 5-20 shooting, including 2-8 from 3 point land. Wally Szczerbiak looked funny with his mask.
Suns 107, Pisstunks 97: Phoenix is a franchise in turmoil and they had been on a bit of cold spell lately. They are currently on the outside looking in at a playoff spot. What could get them out of their funk? That’s right – nothing lifts the spirits like going and beating the Eastern Conference 5th seed on the road. I’ll testify to the fact that Detroit used to be one of the toughest places to play. No longer. I hope Dumars has some major shit up his sleeve to turn around that moribund franchise. You know what? I doubt it, he doesn’t know what the hell he’s doing. He is the one that drafted Darko, after all. Steve Nash had 21 assists. Rodney Stuckey had 1. I can see why Detroit fans are riding him so hard.
Knicks 108, Blazers 109: You already knew how this story ended.
Here are more NBA scores from last night.
Other stuff happened, like the Pro Bowl. I saw it while flipping the channels, but I can’t find a link anywhere, so fuck it. Also, the Grammys were last night, but the results of that do not affect your life in anyway whatsoever.
Maybe Chris Brown thought the alien was attacking him. Had to have been self defense.
I’ll say it again. there are 6 truly terrible teams in the West, only 1 in the East. If the middle tier of the East could play an extra 10 games versus a bunch of droogs, they’d win 50 games, too.
Larry Fitzgerald is the best wide receiver ever.
I’ll take Randle-El over him any day.
/Vinny Cerrato
Jay Novacek is the best tight end ever
I really like those Cavs yellow alternate uniforms. If I didn’t hate them with such a passion, I would rock a jersey.
Shane Falco is the best movie quarterback ever.
Happy – I’m partial to Willie Beaman.
I’ll take the Fridge for my movie QB.
Granted, she was more of a wildcat formation QB, but she got the job done.
i prefer Becky O’Shea. Cavs yellow uni’s are tight. it was disappointing to see them blow that early lead yesterday. Lamar “Clutch” Odom has been beastmode lately.
Ill, are you a Czaban fan? he’s on with a morning show in Milwaukee every morning, and he’s great. do you know if his show is available via podcast?
Quarterback Princess was good. Plus she was hot and had to overcome a lot of adversity.
I will take the QB duo of James (?) Moxon and Lance Harbor
Jon Moxon. I know too much.
Johnny Moxon fetch. come on.
Jimmy Moxon was good.
I DONT WANT YOUR LIFE!!!!
/
Vanderbeek’d
best movie QB ever = scott bakula in unnecessary roughness…
i can’t remember the name of his character tho…BUT HE WAS AWESOME.
What movie has Moxon/Harbor?
I prefer Alan Alda in Paper Lion
/Roman’d
Nick, Varisty Blues
Kicking and Screaming is the best sports movie ever
/
Ty Duffy
Thanks, Rick.
VB is a movie I’ve never seen, and I ended up putting it on my list of movies I will never watch.
Stigs – I catch him on the Sports Reporters talk show on my drive home from work sometimes. He’s pretty good. I like him because he’s very knowledeable when it comes to sports and doesn’t drink the Redskins kool-aide like every other sports guy around DC.
’splain yourself Nick. Varsity Blues is the shizz.
Happy: I missed it. Plain and simple. My buddies swear it’s awesome, but now it’s too late.
So it goes into a pile of movies I chalk up to “missing” the first go ’round and will never see because they can’t possibly live up to the expectations, so I avoid. (any of the Matrix movies, There’s something about Mary, Varsity Blues, a few others.)
Is that the TBL movie philosophy?
yeah, he never holds back when talking about the Skins or Dan Snyder. he’s hilarious, loves golf and football. he’s a good listen for 30 minutes every morning.
NickP – you have to watch There’s Something About Mary. You can’t be let down with that film.
I guess that beats the bsanders movie philosophy: “that director is an asshole and he ripped off the Friday Night Lights book, but I still dig it. Most commenters here despise VB the way I hate Transformers.”
I don’t know, ill. I’ve grown tired of Stiller’s shtick. I have a feeling it might work against that movie today.
True. But I think Matt Dillon’s character is the best part of that movie.
[...] have even envisioned when he invented the keyboard and LCD monitor. Yours truly started the day with a discussion on how the West >* East, if you’re talking about playoff teams. I’ll agree with NickP [...]