Personally, I'd go with the triple-layered and popped Polos
While trolling the net for something new to appease my sexual appetite, I stumbled across this li’l gem at Gizmodo: Buy Your Own ‘Mini-Me’ Robot. What? Are you kidding me? I can now have another Little Rex in my life? Sorry, Fetch. You’re out, Rex Jr. is in.
As you all know, I have longed for the day where I can have myself take out the garbage, chase the geese from my backyard, enjoy long walks on the beach (Oops! Sorry, Clown. Looks like you’re out, too.), getting caught in the rain, and making oh so sweet love to myself, in a much more literal sense than I did just a few minutes ago whilst daydreaming about this innovation.
Here’s what I get: One who sounds like me (Barry White, with just a touch of James Earle Jones), looks like me (perpetual sunglass tanlines included), and apparently does… nothing else like me. For the small sum of $2,215.00, you can have the equivalent of a Cabbage Patch doll with a voice recorder jammed inside. No skipping rocks with me, no playing a game of Joust on my Atari 26hundrizzo, and definitely no wingmanning me at MCL’s Early Bird Special. Sadly, it looks as if my dreams of a miniature robotic Rex Kramer, UpSkirtCamera Operator’er are still just that.
The Little Island Custom Robot Doll Co. has a pretty sweet gallery of pre-orders as well. Complete losers, but worth a peek…
And if you want a much deeper looksie behind the curtain of a reeeeally strange world, check out BBC America’s “Love Me, Love My Doll”. It’s being shown again on February 22. It’s disturbing and sad, but fascinating as hell.
For a slightly less creepy, more emotional jaunt through the mind of these people, check out the film “Lars and the Real Girl”. If you like odd films, this is for you. Full of hope, dreams, anatomically correct fuck dolls, and a stellar performance by one Mr. Ryan Gosling. Rex ain’t gonna lie to ya… a tear may or may not have been shed. And to beat Hef to the punch, no e-jack-uh-lut* was spilled during the watching of this film.
Classic.
Roman, what say you? Roman? Hello? Is this thing on? Rooooomaaaaaan?
/dying
+eleventy
where has Cortes been? oh yeah, study hall.
Sometimes I’ve wondered if the creator of photoshop had a vision for his/her product when they were first developing it. Now I know the answer.
Long Ball Larry
Great, Rex.
Cortes looks great in elf pants.
The Lebatard one is awesome
/check you all again next hour
the asians at the top are starting to stare at me flacco style. it’s kind of freaking me out.
GAY!
Best. Pseudonym. EvAR.
/besides NickP
I respectfully disagree.
Brilliant