So I’m taking over this thang today.
Don’t like it? Tough shit.
Now, I know what you’re thinking, it’s going to be all golf, Buckeyes and LeBron, and you know, for a second there, I thought about it. Just kidding. It didn’t even cross my mind. See, I know what you people like, and I’m a man of the people. I know you like boobs, so there’s some boobs in there. I know you like a diverse selection of linkage to quell the ever-burning boredom that’s known as the “workday.”
Sure, I might not be Rexy or clown, but who is? There’s a good chance you’ll leave this thinking to yourself, “shit, spencer is just a giant dickbag,” and you know, if that’s all the response you give, that’s fine with me. I’m here to do one job, and one job only, and that’s to provide you with a solid 20 minutes of distraction or maybe link to something that’ll serve as a great print’n’shit.
And if that’s the only thing I accomplish, then hell, that’s good enough for me. Think of me as your weekend daddy’s friend who lost a ton in poker and instead of paying up, I’m watching you while he bangs weekend mommy silly for the afternoon. Sure, my apartment smells like mold and there’s a bong on the table, but hey, your real parents wouldn’t let you watch Jerry Springer, would they? Thought so. Read on for the linky nougat.
I’m not going to go all “politicky” on you, but I wasn’t a big W supporter. I thought he came off as a retard. A retard with wealthy parents and great connections, but a retard, plain and simple. And it says a lot about our soon-to-be former president when you hear quotes like this from noted sophisticate, golfer Boo Weekley.
According to Stewart Mandel, Ohio State and Texas are headed for a Fiesta Bowl matchup. Should make things interesting around here…im sure we’ll hear a lot of, “oh, how cute, an FCS team got invited to a BCS Bowl,” and, “fucking Texas sucks a bag of dicks, why don’t they play defense?” Pray this happens.
Pardon my Freedom, but the Freedom are a bunch of pussies. So don’t worry, Lance, just carb load on Freedom Toast and Freedom fries and try to dodge the baguettes, second hand smoke and BO.
Anyone got an idea of how to get more Rays fans to come out to games? Here’s one that’s not on the list…raising ticket prices.
Really have no idea why I’m linking to this, but I love design and I must’ve spent a good half hour with it in the loo today.
When it comes to video games, I’m fickle. I pick one game and get so freakishly good at it, that it’s impossible to enjoy it with others. I’ve been addicted to four of the games on this list. There were varying degrees of addiction. For example, I played Starcraft probably 3 or 4 hours per day in high school but I was addicted to Diablo II to the point where I would play online from 1am, when I got off work, until 9am the next day. But I was the most addicted to Counterstrike. Extended pot exposure plus game that’s easy to waste for hours plus incredible hand-eye coordination from hours of guitar playing equals…well, yea, I missed a fuck ton of class. The current addiction is Soul Calibur IV, which I am unbeatable with seven characters in. That’s right, ladies, I’m a versatile nerd. Stayed the fuck away from WoW and Ever-crack tho…that shit’ll ruin your life. Looking back, it’s kind of shocking that I actually got laid.
Need something to drink? Drain the lizard!
It’s shit like this that fuels my anti-drug enforcement sentiment. Why are we wasting public money on trying to fight and unwinnable “war?” Why do we spend $700 million annually trying to fight marijuana traficking alone when it does absolutely nothing? JFK High School in downtown Cleveland has a 25% male graduation rate. 25% fucking percent. Yet we spend billions to put a proverbial finger in the drug-import dike and billions per month on a war that we’re fighting for no fucking reason. Just let that figure sink in again…25% male graduation rate. One out of fucking four. I might be retarded, but it seems like that money would be better spent elsewhere.
NBA fan or not, this is a phenomenal book. Fantastic writing, great art and, well, you’re looking for more in a book? Jesus, you’re hard to please. Just fucking buy it and thank me later.
And now…boobs. Historic boobs. Boobs that were on the cover of the 1997 Swimsuit issue which came out when I was 13. Um…yea.
(Romeo pic H/T: KSK)
You say you are shocked that you got laid. So you plan on not getting laid the rest of your life?
i thought you were a dickbag long before I started to read this post.
nope…im actually becoming a monk.
I demand high quality golf links.
Starcraft was the shit in HS. I used to be pretty fucking good. So last year I went out and bought another copy, created a new battle.net acount and got pwned for 3 weeks straight until I quit.
Countersrike was beast to. Never played Diablo.
Soul Caliber is ok. But I was unbeatable in any Tekken.
only probation for 50 X pills and 7 grams of blow? that’s a world i want to live in.
ill…hef has me on a strict quota. go to geoffshackelford.com if you want good golf links.
man, you guys are ?’s.
Spencer, so since the Browns won Irish has to give you Chinese massages now or something?
nope…just has to say LBJ is the best player in the NBA for a month.
AWW shit Spencer dippin in the brown sugar. I aint mad at you.
but this sucked and you did it at 1:40 all you made me do was wish that Boo weekly kills himself with a shotgun blast to the face on a hunting trip with the Bushes on accident, with 3 more hours of work left. I feel this way probably because my parents let me watch Jerry Springer when I was little when it was good….Dickbag.
Spence, are you a font nerd too? I used to be a typesetter and I love good design.
Hef…i wouldn’t go as far to say im a font nerd, but i do enjoy it and think it’s important. im just not up to snuff with my serifs and whatnot.
my dad is a certifiable design psycho tho.
Glad TBL changed that headline, he never likes to get things wrong, I should know.
/Bernard Berrian
what did the headline originally say?
cbh, what was the headline?
How the fuck should I know? I am busy snitching on people.
/Bernard Berrian
Honestly I am not sure, TBL wrote a comment saying he changed it I thought.
I’m a dumb fuck.
Why are you a dumb fuck.
And you’ve got to love the glorified headline — government refusing to acknowledge! — I didn’t know they were in the business of officially acknowledging baseball statistics in the first place.
Mike with the answer as always.
That SI swimsuit was probably one of the best evar.
And on a good night, I can beat you in SC IV. And absolutely DESTROY you in Counterstrike.
bitch…i’ll smoke you in soul calibur.
you got me on counterstrike tho…ive seen your shit.
/known danfinuc since grade school, just so everyone knows.
Anyone play Halo?
not really online…
played the fuck out of single player tho.
Online is the best
oh it is..but you can only get raped so many times before it gets old.
Unless you are the rapist.