The Suns did not play last night but I figured you all still wanted to see some Shaq action first thing in the morning. You're welcome.
Good morning friends of brilliance. You’ll be on your own this morning as Hef, Mrs. Hef, HeJew, and HeJew II are headed to the zoo today. I’m thinking it’ll be better than last time because HeJew II flips out whenever he sees animals. In a good way. I tell you what, all I have to do these days is put on the feed from the puppies cam that he quickly forgets that there was no money for dinner because I spent it all on booze and lottery tickets. He’s such a trooper.
Here’s some of the action around the world of sports last night. You’re welcome.
Hef’s Alternate History Game of the Day: Navy 28, Notre Dame 27. In the alternate version of the game, Navy comes roaring back in the final minute to win the game and put the final nail in fat Weis’ coffin. Also in this version, the entire fanbase of Notre Dame commits simultaneous Seppuku in an apology to the rest of the world for their miserable team/traditions. Yes Notre Dame won the game, but aren’t the lies we tell truer than the truths we wish weren’t true? Aren’t they?
Cavs 105, Jazz 93: Future Knick/Net and immature baby LeBronze Jimmy couldn’t pull the trigger on 40 points again but his team won in spite of him. Brilliant business man and all around nice guy, Carlos Boozer, scored a respectable 17 points.
Hef’s Question of the Morning: The Hawks lost again last night, their third in a row; this time at home to the New Jersey Nets in a game that saw Devin Harris score 33 points. Clearly their early succes was just them running on thin air like the Coyote in the Roadrunner cartoons. The Question: How many games in a row will they lose now that they’ve realized their success was a myth perpetrated by the [Hard J] run media? Bonus Question: In what other ways are the Atlanta Hawks like the Coyote? Penalty Question: When is it okay to drop a Hard J?
I drop a hard J every time I walk into a bank. Is that wrong?
It’s not wrong, but your file has been placed in the MLJ penalty box for five days. When you get out you have to fight a jewish clown. Good luck.
hef…by aligning yourself with boozer, you’ve reserved a spot in hell next to judas and brutus.
Will there be a cool catchphrase to go along with me? Something along the lines of “et tu, Hef?” But, you know, less derivative.
Good to see one more person on the Atlanta As Frauds bandwagon. Welcome aboard.
Also, Cavs played pretty damn well last night. Congrats on the win, Hef.
Thanks, Nick. I had a lot of great wins last night. But you know me…
i got nothin.
nick, have you read the free darko book yet?
I haven’t. Should I?
i recommend it…they have a bunch of widgets on the site freedarkobook.com. check it out to see if it’s your thing.
i loved it tho. bought it thursday night and burned through it.
I take it back.
Anyone starting Larry Johnson this week?
Did TBL get blown up?
seemingly so, Nick; Who knew Billy Wagner pitched in the winter leagues
Holmes cock did it
You’re welcome for introducing you and the mini-Jews to the puppy cam!
adrian peterson is amazing
Hef, might I suggest some yellow bellied sliders. We have two and I, as an adult, can watch them for hours on end.