A Drunken Corollary: The Mets and The Germans During World War II

As I was driving to The World Champion New York Football Giants game on Sunday, something got me thinking. For a site run by Heffy Heffelstein, we certainly have a lot of Hitler references. Scratch that. Nick P has a lot of Hitler references. While none of this is shocking, it got me thinking, in what way can I work a Hitler reference into this here site as well? You see, I am a history buff. In fact, I have a degree in History from the prestigious SUNY Cortland and had designs on being a teacher. But alas, I really don’t like other people’s children so I canned that idea. So as I was in the car, it hit me. The Mets are like the Germans in World War II. This actually disappointed me because I like to think I root for the good guy. But the German people also believed that they rooted for the good guy too. So let me lay out for you why I came to this realization.

1999-2001 World War I

This era for the Mets was a time where they were getting back to power after years of trying their best to unify. As they unified and returned to prominence they would run into old time powers and start a war on many fronts. First, the took on the Atlanta Braves. This was akin to taking on France. The Mets were scrappy and felt that the best defense was a good offense. They took it to the Braves and all through the 1999 season the battling to a stalemate over the NL East. They lost the division but battled them again in the NLCS. After mounting one of the biggest comebacks in playoff history, culminating with Robin Ventura’s Grand Slam Single. They gave away their position by having Kenny Rogers’ walk home the winning run in the bottom of the 11th of Game 6. While still dealing with the Braves they would get back to the playoffs in 2000, this time taking on a weakened Empire in the Cardinals. Like the Russians, the Cardinals were dealing with the issues of mixing a young and old team and were surprised into surrender by a scrappy Met team bringing themselves to new heights by advancing to the World Series.

In the World Series, they took on an old strong Empire in the Yankees (Great Britain). After starting off strong in Game 1, the Yankees came back and won that game in the 12th inning after Armando Benitez blew the game in the 9th. The Yankees would handily win the World Series virtually sending the Mets down to a tail spin. The Braves finally finished off any last attempts at superiority when in one week John Franco and Armando Benitez gave up game winning homers to Brian Fucking Jordan to end the season and the war.

2002-2004 The Weimar Republic

This is a time in Met history where they were getting used to being a second class citizen. They let go of Bobby Valentine and replaced him with Art Howe. They took away members of the Powerful Met teams and replaced them with old expensive veterans. Roberto Alomar, Jeromy Burnitz and Big Fat Mo Vaughn would signify this era. There were suspicions of homosexuality and rampant partying and debauchery. The powers that be were powerless and finally in one last abuse of power the Mets traded a young up and comer, Scott Kazmir and got themselves a shitty pitcher with control issues, Victor Zambrano. That was too much. The fans had enough. They demanded that the Mets get back to being a power and to do it by any means necessary.

2005 Rearmament

Omar Minaya was brought in to fix the problem. He then hired Willie Randolph. Willie was a former member of the Yankees who once was a Met for a year and had delusions of grandeur. He was from Brooklyn so he felt that he was the one to turn the Mets around. The Mets retooled and brought in Pedro Martinez, who would be like the Autobahn, and provide a road to get players like Carlos Beltran and Carlos Delgado to come to the team. Willie built himself a Youth that would follow him and be beholden to him for their success and teaching them how to win. David Wright and Jose Reyes were to adhere or face the consequences. Others who did not adhere to the winning ways would be taken out and shipped off. Braden Looper knows this all too well. With a Rebuilt Met team Willie was ready to take on the National League.

2006-2008 World War II

In 2006, Willie Randolph led his Mets to a total destruction of the National League. They took on all comers and beat them handily. They were obnoxious and joyful and showed no mercy. They had all different types of weapons that the league was not prepared to handle. The Braves were so arrogant that they had not attempted to keep up and it would cost them. They handily won the NL East and the Braves surrendered early on. The Mets were in charge and ready to march towards a Championship and total annihilation of the Major Leagues. The Cardinals are all that stood in their way. The Cardinals were no push over but eventually the Mets went up in the 8th inning of the 7th game of the NLCS. This was their Stalingrad. If the Mets broke through they would march to victory. Instead, Yadier Molina hits a home run and Carlos Beltran strikes out looking. They would be stuck in Stalingrad.

In 2007, all things started off well. They were still handily defeating the Braves and things seemed like they could be handled. But slowly the team started to hit a malaise. Were they tired? Were they over extended? Were they not as good as they thought they were? At this point the Phillies (The United States) would come into play. They were pesky the whole season battling them and beating them (like in North Africa) but in reality it was having very little consequence. By September, the Mets were up 7 games with 17 to play. The war was still there to be won and then, they stopped moving. The Phillies kept charging. Willie tried everything, including crazy moves like pitching Guillermo Mota for 3 innings, only this was to the detriment to his team. He was losing a grip. His players were losing confidence and finally. D-Day. The Mets lost the last game in the first inning by giving up 7 runs and the Phillies won going to the playoffs. It was devastating. Willie was now fighting a two front war.

2008 started slow. The season was in trouble. The Mets were battling both the opponents and the fans and Media. The ultimate two front war. Willie was hunkering down in his bunker, yelling about race and lack of respect. Willie could not right the ship and he was losing control over his team. Finally he was fired, leaving the team alone to fend for itself. There was a late surge in July and August but this was akin to the Battle of the Bulge. This was a false surge. It relied on kids and old men and all the while knowing that the weakness in the bullpen was so cataclysmic that eventually the Reich would fall. In September it did. The Mets lost that final game and the Allied powers of Philadelphia and Milwaukee came together to finally defeat the Mets. The Mets closed down Shea Stadium that day which can be equated with the bombing of the Reichstag. This time it left the Mets fans so devastated and so embarrassed it left them searching for answers. How did this happen? Why did it? It is to the point when people ask who you root for you are afraid to say, “The Mets” with fear you will have to answer questions about the ugliness. We hope to wipe it out of our history books. But in reality it is us, the Mets fans, who are to blame. We wanted to be a superpower. We wanted to rule baseball. We wanted it so bad that we followed Willie Randolph blindly when we should have kept our eyes open.

I wrote all of this purposely leaving out any real Holocaust analogy. I felt it was wrong for a sports blogger to equate baseball to such a horrifying ordeal. That and I believe it is understood that the Mets have been killing their fans for years.