Well, what a wonderful great marvelous day we have had here at MLJ. Rex cut and pasted a private conversation for the benefit of you, the reader. Yes, I do believe Lars is a cockbag. Fetch interviewed our Jerk O’ the Month, the one and only Sparty, who is the founder of Sparty and Friends and a MLJ gadfly. Nick found another way to demean Corey Patterson and Dusty Baker by not claiming that Corey is hosing Dusty’s baby girl. And I had an emotional meltdown. Anywho, a few points of business before we get to tonight’s games. I will not be with you tomorrow and through the weekend. I have a business trip. It fucking blows. I hate going away for business on weekends. Very very Bruce. So that leaves you with the rest of this menagerie to get you through a Friday. I am sure you won’t be devastated. I am a baseball fan and a stat guy so looking at the stats, we could put up the cure for cancer here Friday afternoon and you won’t read it. We will try to have something for you (Mikeychx) anyway. Point number two, Spencer is planning on starting a fun new mini-series next week in which we and our readers provide their favorite College Football experiences. Mostly, the best places to see a College Football Game. If you want to send us your favorite, e-mail Spencer at spencer09600@gmail.com. And the last point, I heard from a reliable source that a certain ghost from the past is coming back to MLJ full time starting Monday. Some of us miss him so much it has “ruined” their MLJ experience. I personally think he is overrated. But that’s just me. Either way, he is welcomed home with open arms.

Tonight, begins a four game stretch for the Mets and Brewers that will determine their postseason fates. The Phillies may join the party tomorrow but New York and Philly look like they are about to get slammed by a two day monster storm. That should provide all sorts of fucked up scenarios that may not be settled until November, where the winner will get annihilated by the Cubs. I am totally lost right now. Johan’s brilliance lifted me to new heights and last night’s awfulness has just sunk me into a day long blind rage. The Brewers are finally starting to step up but they are playing the Pirates. I don’t know what to do with myself, but most likely I will be sitting in front of the TV watching the Mets as I pack. Feel free to stop by and chat as we watch the following:

Mets/Cubs -Rich Harden is going 5 tonight. Pedro Martinez needs to channel a little bit of old school Petey to keep the Mets in this. I doubt that’s happening. I just hope the Mets don’t kill me. Oh, they are 1.5GB of the Phillies for the NL East and tied with the Brewers for the Wild Card.

Pirates/Brewers - Yovani Gallardo is attempting to be a savior for the Brew Crew after a 4 month break. I think this may be a bit desperate but it is the Pirates so what the hell. Zach Duke gets the loss for Pittsburgh.

White Sox/Twins - If this wasn’t on at the same time as the Mets impending collapse, I would be watching. The Twins are attempting to sweep the Sox and go a half game up. Fetch is puking as we speak because, as we learned the other night, Fetch gets extremely nervous before all big sporting events. They don’t have to involve his team either. Fascinating. If the Twins win, Ozzie Guillen and Tampa Bo will get together and murder people.

Padres/Dodgers – Jake Peavy will attempt to keep the champagne on ice as the Dodgers have a Magic Number of 1. Greg Maddux is pitching at home and against the Padres which will make him look like the Hall of Famer he is. Of course, this game is meaningless if the D-Bags lose to the Cardinals who are playing now. Check here to see if we bother watching. My guess is they pop the corks regardless after the game.

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