Dear Reader,

Labor Day Weekend is upon us and we have all been granted the three day weekend that we so deserve.  But with that weekend comes a great responsibility that we need to address.  As you know, College Football started this week and the NFL starts next week.  And when it does, your Sundays will be filled with football and gambling.  Unfortunately for all of us, tonight’s football-less evening will be filled with mediocrity.  Yes, the Arizona Diamondbacks and the Los Angeles Dodgers will take center stage on ESPN.  So with that in mind I ask of you just one thing: please don’t watch.

Yes, it is rare when you will hear me ask you not to watch baseball and to instead spend time with your family and friends but this is one of them.  Take the night off tonight and go enjoy the weather.  The temperature is cooling (in Arizona, this is fantastic news) and their is school in the air.  Why ruin the glorious start to my favorite season by celebrating the unremarkable?  Turn off the TV and go BBQ something (preferably edible).  Take this time to learn a new language or write that letter to your grandmother that you’ve been putting off.

My friends, this is not good baseball.  Both of these teams are struggling to put together consistent efforts.  Even with the Manny Ramirez and Adam Dunn trades these teams are treading water.  So I plead with you.  Don’t subject yourself to such awfulness.

You’ll thank me later,

Hef

p.s. I’ll be at the game tonight and I’ll tell you all about it tomorrow if you really are curious.

Good Morning, friends of baseball.  It’s that time of the week again, the time where you are treated to Hef’s Quality Start in which he recaps the day’s baseball scores and regales you with tales of wonder.  Well, this morning, I’m all out of wonder.  Instead, I’m full of sleepiness.  I was at the ASU/NAU football game last night with my son and there’s nothing more tiring than repeatedly explaining the rules of football to a six year who has grown up with a much better sport like baseball.  I don’t know how many of you have gone through similar battles with your wives/girlfriends/mothers/sisters/female person in your life, but my son asks questions response questions that take twice as long as the original question to answer.  He thinks field position is silly and wishes everyone would just go for it on 4th down.  I don’t blame him.

Anyway, here’s some of the games that we think deserve a recap. Read the rest of this entry »

The Dodgers are facing the Dbacks in Phoenix this weekend and now’s as good a time as any to take a look at how well the blockbuster trades are faring for each team.

Since the trade, the Dodgers are 11-17 and have fallen to 4.5 games out of first place.  In spite of this, Manny Ramirez has been on a tear.  In 100 ABs, ManRam is hitting .400 (but only has an OBP of .487) has 7 HR and 23 RBI.

The problem with the Dodgers isn’t Manny, it’s their starting pitching, bullpen, and every hitter not named Manny Ramirez.  They’ve lost 8 in a row and 10 of their last 11.  They’re only 1.5 games up on the Rockies who are probably thinking about now that they can make a run similar to last year.  I don’t blame them.

Since the trade, the Snakes are 9-7.  This number was much higher before they were swept by the hapless Padres in San Diego earlier this week.  Dunnie’s OBP is .506.  Five-oh-six.  He gets on base more than half the time and because of this has scored 10 runs for the team in the past three weeks.  He also has 2 HRs and 9 RBI.  His defense is downright awful in right field but he might be moved to first with the return of Justin Upton to the team.

So what have we learned?  Both of these teams suck out loud and don’t deserve to go to the playoffs this year.  Luckily this is baseball and not Vietnam and there are rules.

Today baseball takes a backseat to the Buckeyes first game of the season. To get everyone in the spirit, here’s a quick video.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzSfCv3u3d0&feature=related]

Bucks 33 – YSU 9 /science

Okay, now baseball: Read the rest of this entry »

Who am I kidding. Let’s go Phillies!

[vodpod id=ExternalVideo.675141&w=425&h=350&fv=%26rel%3D0%26border%3D0%26]

Can you believe this?  Not only is RexKramerVacationTaker on another vacation, but clown esta trabajando muy diligentemente.  So you’re stuck with me and I know for a fact that neither of us is happy about this.  So I’m not even going to talk about baseball.  Rex never does and you guys don’t whine about that dude. All he does is talk about the ladies (read: geriatrics) he “pleasures.”  And you know what, I live a wild and crazy life too.  But I think that pictures paint a better story.

So instead of regaling you with my tales of mischief, I will fill your eyes with all sorts of other controversial images.  Just like Rex.

There’s Nothing to Click Here Read the rest of this entry »

God, why have you forsaken me?

I feel so helpless

Serenity Now

Watched Cole toy with the Cubs lineup like a kid with the bright sun and a magnifying glass toying with army ants

Serenity Now

The bottom of the lineup eeked out some runs off of the unhittable Ryan Dempster

Serenity Now

Confidently sitting on my Barco Lounger as Cole left the game up 3 runs. The bullpen has been brilliant all season.

Serenity Now

Ryan gives up 3 hits, go ahead run at the plate. In comes reliable Chad to save the day

Serenity Now

I hear a whisper from Chicago. It said Rammie with a slammie. Didn’t give it too much thought

Serenity Now

One and oh count, here comes the pitch

Rammie lofts it to the stars in center

Shane stands motionless, refuses to look back

Serenity Now

My creaky legs lift me up as I walk to the kitchen and polish off my sharpest knife

Serenity Now

Ski mask? Check. Black shirt and pants? Check. List of people to find tonight? Check. Hearing my neighbors lock their doors and turn out the lights? Check. Car won’t start? Fuck.

Walk back inside

Shut out the lights

Light up a cig

Long inhale

Deep Exhale

Insanity Later

I guess he’s some sort of footballer or something. Plays for some team in Ohio. Look ‘er over.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oE-TH096R-8&feature=related]

Read the rest of this entry »

I realize the following post may be sacrilegious, but it’s one I feel needs to be written. Fire Joe Morgan is one of the best blogs of all time, but let’s not kid ourselves – lately it is slipping. To me, yesterday’s post exemplifies just how far the site’s quality has fallen.

The premise: Richard Griffin wrote a post defending the win statistic for pitchers. He thinks it’s the best way to measure a pitcher’s worth because “the team goal is victories.” Now obviously this is wrong in so many ways, and FJM is ready to tell us why. We get it; wins are a stupid way to measure a pitcher’s value. But the way Junior tried to dissect Griffin’s prose is just flat wrong on so many levels. Let’s dig in. Read the rest of this entry »