After seeing this article yesterday updating the latest National League All-Star vote totals, we thought it would be wise to offer our loyal MLJ readers our substantive and always* flawless analysis.
The No-Doubt Club:
1B Lance Berkman, 2B Chase Utley, 3B Chipper Jones,
The fans got these right. Albert Pujols is the only one who has a legitimate case. He’s the best defensive first baseman in the league, and his defensive value probably makes him worth a little bit more than Berkman, but missing three weeks with an injured calf will effectively kill any chance Pujols had to start the game. When you consider his defense at second base, Utley has been the best player in baseball, and he should be the 3rd Philly in a row to win the MVP. And unlike Rollins and Howard, Utley will actually deserve it!
The No Way In Hell Club:
OF Ken Griffey, Jr., SS Miguel Tejada
Reds fans don’t even want Griffey playing OF every day in Great American Ballpark, let alone representing the National League in the All-Star Game. A pretty strong case can be made for Griffey being the worst everday player in the all of MLB. He has a 100 OPS+, which is perfectly average for an MLB player. However, it’s terrible for an offensive position like right field. Also, Griffey could easily be the worst defensive outfielder in the game. Add it all up, and you have a player who is replacement level (if I’m being generious). Look, I love Junior. He’s one of the best of all-time, but his time in the sun is long gone. Let’s give Nate McLouth (who?) and his .301/.392/.574/152 OPS+ Junior’s spot in the line-up and let him play center field; the kid deserves it. As for SS, it’s so obviously Hanley Ramirez that I would be doing you a disservice if I wasted your time stating why he should be starting. You’re MLJ readers; you** know why he’s deserving.
The Drunk Chicago Fans Shouldn’t Be Allowed To Vote Club:
OF Alfonso Soriano, OF Kosuke Fukudome, C Geovany Soto
Way to go, Chicago. As of today’s voting, you were able to get three of your players into undeserving spots in the starting line-up. Granted, the country of Japan may also have something to do with Fukudome’s vote total, but that doesn’t help my argument. I’d rather blame it all on those pesky Chicagoans. First, Alfonso Soriano: His 123 OPS+ is solid if not spectacular, but a .330 OBP for a guy who gets pissy if he doesn’t get to bad leadoff just doesn’t cut the mustard. He’s out. Next, Fukudome: I don’t care how great his defense is in right field. A 113 OPS+ and no power from a corner outfield spot leaves a lot to be desired. Out. Finally, Geovany Soto. This is hard from an emotional standpoint. He’s obviously not the best catcher in the National League, but he’s been an amazing player for my fantasy team. Luckily for our 12 readers, we saber nerds were raised by computers from a young age to be emotionless bastards. He’s out, too.
Who deserves the final three spots? Catcher is easy. Brian McCann has been a monster this year (.301/.384/.573/151 OPS+). He’s hitting like an elite 1B while playing the toughest position on the field. The last two outfield spots get a little trickier. The usual suspects like Carlos Beltran and the aforementioned Ken Griffey, Jr. are both having subpar years. Josh Hamilton would be a great choice if the Reds hadn’t traded him (Have I mentioned the Reds management sucks lately?) to the American League. Also, I like to actually have a left fielder play left field and a right fielder play right field, which further compounds the problem. None of that 3 center fielders in one outfield BS for MLJ. The right fielder has to be Ryan Ludwick. He has been torching the baseball this year to the tune of .318/.388/.667/172 OPS+. The man started out on fire and has never let up. Left field is easily the toughest position to fill in the entire lineup. But rather than bore you with even more flawless analysis, I think I’ll just be a homer and pick Adam Dunn and his National League leading 56 walks. Maybe that wasn’t so tough after all.
The Lineup:
Hanley SS
Dunn LF
Utley 2B
Chipper 3B
Berkman 1B
McCann C
Ludwick RF
McLouth CF
I’ve always wanted to see Dunn hit second; look into that, Dusty.
*Except for Hef, Gonzo, Roman, Spence, Stigs, Clown, and Nomo
**Unless you are TBL commenter RumealRobinson




Well you got your wish, Soriano is dead…angry about being out for 6 weeks with a broken hand region.
And McCann isn’t as obvious a choice as you might think. Soto’s been good.
God I hate the Cubs.
you forgot:
***the National League manager will find a way to fuck this game up.
TBL server is fucked again. prepare for a party over at MLJ.
I got a half a bag of pretzels and some Zima leftover from 1996 bring the party!
I can’t view anything @ SI.com anymore but my guess is that HotClicks has linked to the superbly analyzed statistical review of the “Hot 100″ lists that iggy did. Pure speculation.
Oh and Nick…YOU GOT EDINSON VOLQUEZ…HE WILL MEAN MORE TO THE REDS OVER THE NEXT 7-8 YEARS THAN HAMILTON WILL.
/turns off caps lock
fuck the NL.
Spencer (REDACTED)…Concise and Insightful
That roster looks good, but I think Braun should be in left. He has more RBI’s, HR’s, a better AVG and has a better 5 o’clock shadow.
the 5:00 shadow is the most underrepresented characterstic of an athlete by stat junkies.
I wrote in Blake Dewitt’s porch chops for Shortstop. Covers two positions with those beasts. I don’t think Dewitt is an Armenian name, but I bet Joyce Dewitt from from Thre’s Company had a hairy brown eye. So, Maybe it is. Who Knows?
i’m in a 5×6 roto league with the 5 O’Clock shadow being our 6th offensive category.
in other site news: i might actually have time to write a post again after getting my ass dragged behind a truck at work for a week straight.
no beef with your list as long as it includes hanley…. and the NL has got to find a way to start both uggla and utley..
cortes, Since the All Star game is in an AL park, don’t they use a DH? If so, I am sure Uggla will have a shot at that position.
Spencer: just timing your next post with the long-anticipated release of GNR’s Chinese Democracy? Marketing is key.
MLJ is going to have a record day of comments now that TBL is down for the count! Congrats, guys!
Soto is deserving of an All-Star spot. Oh, and Fuck all the Cubs haters.
thenug…i have a confession to make. i am buckethead, lead guitarist for GnR. my chops make panties wet.
The TBL dilemma: ‘97 Mazada or more server space?
clown…more protein.
How do people keep commenting on TBL? I see that he put up a new post, and there are like 8 comments on there. Whenever I click on something though, it just errors out.
If you hit refresh about 27 straight times, the page will load for you and you can comment.
plus, it’s a fucking basketball post. sort of.
Extremely frustrating. TBL just went out to buy a dog so he can kick it.
kicking dogs > kicking servers
hurts foot less and the dog usually comes back
im hungry.
got the munchies?
spencer you are like my wife, just spouting out non sequiters that have nothing to do with nothing..
problem solved: http://majorleaguejerk.com/2008/06/12/national-league-all-stars/#comment-3969
Live blogs don’t work well on Microsoft Word
roman, when your wife was yelling “Oh, God” and “Harder!”, I thought it was entirely appropo…
yeah, and they probably don’t work well with shitty servers.
CRM, why are you a Marlins fan? aren’t you from upstate NY?
soflasports.wordpress.com
// shameless plug
Because I was a gay little kid and liked the color teal.
/kind of true
roman…my non sequiters have everything to do with everything. plus, my pony loaf of a job has my mental state inbetween delirium and suicide.
Because I AM a gay little kid and like the color teal.
/made more true
cortes my boy…put you website in the url think in your wordpress account that way people can click your name and see the goodness
Guys, CRM has a hot girlfriend. Also, her WiFi works great from right here outside her bedroom window.
Phyllis Micklefat’s showing off the farmer-tanned guns today.
My girlfriend does have great WiFi.
CRM…no live-blog live-blog today?
spencer – if the server issues get cleared up – yes
CRM..from the texts that clown is sending em from the bushes in front of you GF’s place…he Wifi is nice and smooth…not a lot of coverage areas but what is being covered gets REALLY strong and fast service
CRM, you’re more than welcome to live-blog it here as a guest poster. It’s not like we’re picky about giving out admin privileges and “writing” gigs. (see: Hefalicious, FutureHef, Hef, NiceHef)
If it is about golf Hefler approves
You can live blog here. What are you live blogging?
never you mind, out of town sucka.
Yeah Hef, why do you remind everyone that you’re out of town and then post/comment all the time? Is the vacation not as fun as you expected?
Mind your own business, Hefler. You’re out of town. We have overthrown Gonzo. I made the Hairy Buffalo and CRM is supplying a shit ton of office cafeteria-pilfered styrofoam cups.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=lhYxLd8O9lA
Get out of my head, Sportsgal.
And Intern RomanWarHelmet, get over here and finish mowing my lawn (not a euphemism. or is it?).
since the boss is gone, im so leaving at 2 to golf. and im NOT taking any time off. take that lawya.
Intern my ass..I am the talent…you are lucky I don’t ask you all to separate my m&ms
Good read Nick.
Have to agree with pki on Braun in LF though. And Even though I think Hanely should be the starter and HATE Tejada, it’s not as black and white as you make it out to be. Tejada has been much better defensively, stole some bases himself, and is only getting crushed by Hanley in OBP and HRs. He has better numbers in dubs and rbi’s. Again, not that I would vote for Tejada over Hanley, just saying I could see why someone would.
I’m not on vacation bitches (that’s next week). I’m at a conference for work on an island that only rich people know about. So I check in on my favorite people (and spence) every now and again.
And ill is right. The Hanley/Tejada debate is not so black and white. But I prefer Hanley.
Times like this I wish I had my own blog…
anyone else following the open on the computer? I don’t see myself getting a whole lot done today.
Times like this I wish I my own blog…
/CRM
I am closing on my house today so I don’t plan on doing much other than looking for a new grill.
this is fucking ridiculous. ive been watching the US Open for 13 minutes now and they’ve shown exactly 3 golf shots, all tiger highlights. SHOW THE FUCKING MATCH, DONT SHOVE PUFF SHIT DOWN OUR THROATS.
fuck ESPN. fuck them.
other people golf besides Tiger?
Spence: I watched a little of the Open, but after every Tiger shot they would analyze it for about 5 minutes and I about threw up. Euro 2008 is way better.
first house pki?
this is the US Open…why is tom rinaldi getting more airtime than Tiger and Phil?
shoot me.
first house. We are going from a shitty 2bdrm apartment to a 3 level Townhouse with a deck and a patio. It is basically adding about 1000 Sq feet.
spencer…Tom Rinaldi brings the sexy
congratulations. we got our first house in a simliar situation as yours about a month ago and are loving the space. do you have a garage? I’m loving the garage.
pki..congrats on the house…i am currently looking to upgrade..but that first day in your own home is pretty cool…until later that month and you see your first mortgage payment..then you long for the Apt.
No garage. In DC, a garage costs about 100k more. We do have 2 reserved p-spots in front of the house though.
at least you’ve got your own parking spots. it’s nice that the only door that can bang into your car now is the little lady’s and not some dickhead at the apartment complex.
Thanks guys. Yeah the mortgage itself isn’t much more than our rent was. It is all those fucking taxes and shit added on that kills you.
pki…do you have oil heat?..If so…you will WISH you were back paying rent.
natty gas
pki…sign up for the yearly plan…the one that gives you money back for what you don’t use…natty gas is almost as bad as oil but you can control the expense
thanks for the input. I will definitely check into that one. This shit is all new to me. We were not even paying for electricity in my old apartment.
It took me like 5 minutes to find where the double asterisk was in that post.
[...] (Major League Jerk)-We’ll be at the All-Star game, so we might as well look at what some people’s opinions are of the “players that should be there too.” [...]