Hef
NickP
Gonzo
clown
spencer096
RexKramerDangerSeeker
romanwarhelmet
stigs
ombudswoman
fetch
Intern CRMThis news just breaking from the Major League Jerk News desk. Jason Raj McIntyre, better known 
as the Big Lead or the Huge Lead depending on his cycle, has admitted to rampant use of performance enhancing drugs. This has not been doubted for a while but when prompted by internet hero and possible Deadspin editor candidate lozo, he admitted it. You can find the full quotes here. Here is the admission:
yup, totally juiced. once cycle a month, and had the wife injecting my ass like Debbie and Big Mac.
The more we hear on this story, the more you will know. This is obviously a major development in the blogosphere and the MLJ news center will keep you abreast of all activity.
*An attempt at satire dedicated to the man we love…Please Jason’s mom don’t be mad.
Filed under: Stupid post, Uncategorized | Tagged: Blatent Lie, irresponsible journalism, PED, The Big Lead
I love how a possibly related post is: A Third Rate Alternative to The Big Lead. This post confirms that’s true. Well done, Roman.
If we had an ombudsman, you’d be getting an earful.
listen..I have no time to confirm sources..this is a top notch news organization
I didn’t know that M.Night Shamalamdingdong had a son
Heh, heh - you said “breast”!
RWH, I made a couple of slight edits for you. It’s all about journalistic credibility.
Easily the worst part about that picture is the Yankees hat.
ill start the post, “If I was TBL, this is what I’d take.”
First you told him to eff off, now this. you sure know how to pick your battles Roman.
I’m more interested in the Irish name coupled with the Indian/What’s Happening middle name added to the photo of M. Night.
And that right sleeve clearly screams, “You must protect this house!”.
Stigs, I was hoping to get back into his good graces.
His workout plan sounds like an infomercial: go to the gym 4 days a week, run on the off days. It’ll only take a month.
What an original idea, LessFunnyHelmet (according to MikeNYC). Take an out of context comment snippet from TBL and build an entire post around it. It seems so…so… what’s the word I’m looking for…”familiar”.
http://majorleaguejerk.com/2008/05/15/the-get-of-all-gets/
/yeah, i stole your ellipsiseses
@roman: interesting strategy. hope it works out.
Hey clown, thats my workout plan too. Nonetheless, I haven’t enjoyed the same results.
Rex…we are a team..if I need to use your bat…as little used as it is..I can use it to drive in the run…
TBL is married? He just lost all of his female readers.
Oh man. Is that the Salt River in the backround? I wish I was floating down the Salt River with a pile of uppers, a half dozen strippers and Vin Scully calling a “Doyger” game.
The Salt River is awesome. One time, my friends and I floated down that river for three hours drinking about 30 beers between the three of us. And we didn’t have to stop and pee once. Not once.
Bridge over the River Kwai, according to his TBLness.
I don’t believe anything he says anymore.
Nah, I’ve known he’s married for awhile and I still read. I believe me and guiness are the only female readers he has.
By the way, I have no idea how it’s possible for someone to go to the gym 4 days a week and run the other three if they have a job that requires working in an office. Unless they have absolutely no social life. Won’t at least ONE day a week be lost to a hangover?
sportsgal…your answer…PEDs..that and he is married…you do anything to get out of the house when you are married.
Sportsgal, as someone who loses 4-5 days a week to hangovers, I gotta agree.
/still in bed.
// Spence, come roll me over. Gettin’ the bed sores somethin’ fierce.
Almost forgot… Sportsgal, as the Jerkette o’ the Month, we need to knock out this interview, unless you want to be July’s JotM.
Are you being serious about Jerkette of the Month?
“Almost forgot… Sportsgal, as the Jerkette o’ the Month, we need to knock out this interview, unless you want to be July’s JEOMK”
/fixed
Sportsgal, I don’t kid around when it comes to exploiting TBL’s female readership for our own gain.
Consists of a silly questionnaire and your choice of two photoshop “representations”, dependent upon your preferred cup size (not “real”. “preferred”.).
Plus, Hef is out of town, so when Mom’s away, we totally bag this whole baseball dork shit and do whatever we want, as depicted in this photo taken at MLJ Headquarters:
http://i33.photobucket.com/albums/d84/missmeganp/WeirdScience28.jpg
Nomo…your sores will heal. you can wait.
sportsgal…i go to the gym 4 times per week, and have no problem maintaining a social life. hit it up tuesdays and thursdays at 530 am and then sat and sun either before or after golf. gotta make sacrifices to keep the belly away. it’s really not that hard to do.
oh, and since Hef is gone for awhile…im so posting everything i can about OSU and LeBron. WHOO HOO!!!! PARTY!!!! SMOKE TREE IN THE LIVING ROOM!!!!
I am bored at work and did a google search on PKIGUY22. Turns out, every comment I have made on Deadspin and TBL can be found. This scares me just a tad.
Excuse me while I delete every photo ever take of me.
F#ck Yeah. I either took a really big hit or Woddy Hayes is choking me.
CoRM, you better get to those photos before I do.
unless your name is pkiguy22 or your future bosses/girlfriends/boyfriends can decipher that, i wouldn’t worry.
i kinda wish i used a better alias than my real first name with some random numbers after it.
Googling my name used to be cool: the first like 10 things would be sports stuff I was in, ie the 2003 Babe Ruth World Series
Now one of the first couple is my facebook page. My how times have changed.
spence, feel free to use choadsmoker096.
spencer…I went with the disgusting root and when I tell my wife what I am up too and she reads my stuff..she is fully disgusted and won’t tell anyone else…one person I know reads this site
Finally I found a benefit of having a boring common name. I could search for hours and not find a thing on me. Woo Hoo anonymity!
monkeykong, do you comment on TBL?
Nice drop in fetch.
Hey look..there’s the guy I know.
Monkeykong is atl. Duh.
Do you know how many Hef Hefflesteins there are on the web. Just me. I’m fucked.
The first thing that comes up when I google myself is a reference to one of my recent vacations. It basically makes me sound like I was playing ghetto craps with a bunch of football players.
clown…choadsmoker? you know the choad is naturally more powerful during the Big Squirt right? ill take that as a psedo…i have no idea how im going to take that, but it’s funny nevertheless.
roman…i was considering going the refined route. Sheik Bialy Kodafa or soemthing liek that.
@stigs: No I can’t get the accounts to sync up and i’m too lazy (aka too busy browsing porn). So I just stalk RWH
sportsgal..isn’t that what you do every Tuesday?
Tuesday Night Craps! Hell to-the-Motherfuckin Yeah!
I can’t find myself at all when I google my name. That’s not a good thing.
sportsgal, were you at the World Series of Dice?
clown I would not be too shocked.
Sportsgal makes me want to gamble. I’m getting twitchy
Re: Jerkette “interview” - I’m going to pass on posting my e-mail address here. Hit me up on myspace or something.
Spence, I work out 4 days a week at the gym, I was pointing out the fact that TBL said he’d run the other 3. There’s no way I’m going running on a Saturday or Sunday after a night of boozing, especially in the summer.
Googling my name brings back thousands of hits, which completely fly in the face of everything you know and love about “me”. I’m actually a decent human being. Sorta… Or I’m just living a public lie.
sportsgal…oh i hear that, my bad. fuck running anyways.
Sportsgal, never in a million years would I be a chick who posts her email on a message board. Unless of course you count my other alias of HotTeenBabeWhoParties @ hotmale.com. I’ve seen the ramifications firsthand and they’re not for everyone.
If you want to partake, holla at consultantnomo at the google mail place. If not, I’ll just make up the answers.
I’m with you, running blows. It’s a struggle for me to get on the elliptical for 30 minutes.
I never thought I would defend running. I don’t mind it at all. Of course I feel like an old man after because it destroys my back, which is why I do the elliptical every once in awhile. And then feel like a girl while doing it.
The fuck is an elliptical?
i go to the gym 3 days a week. but i’m with sportsgal, as much as i’d like to go on the weekends, i’m way too hungover for that. i’ve been thinking of running/walking/jogging during all Brewers games as opposed to watching them on the couch drinking. i wonder if a 3hour trip to the gym would get me weird looks.
CRM, I think it’s those little dotty things that RWH puts in between each of his sentence fragments.
/thank you. you’ve been great. don’t forget to tip your waitstaff
Ronald, the eliptical is the thing that is similar to a treadmill with the feet thing that go around in an ellipse. it’s much better for your legs, knees and joints. but not as good as a cardio workout IMO.
Rex is just on fire right now. The thought of him interviewing sportsgal must have him turned on
what the fuck is all this exercise talk? Jesus H Hockeysticks…doesn’t everyone gain 8o pounds since college because you sit at a desk, get married, have a kid and like beer and fired food? Anyone…seriously…fuck..being in shape is for losers and single people.
And there is no greater workout than rowing. Order a Concept II machine for the winter, and hit the water in the warmer months. Peace, tranquility, and a kick yer ass workout all at once. And it doesn’t crush the back/knees, which is why I took it up.
The elliptical is a cardio workout.
Being single and liking beer and fried foods is exactly the reason why I go to the gym. Oh, and only guys are allowed to gain 80lbs since college without it being a big deal.
See, some good has come out of TBL’s drug scandal revelation. We all recognize that doing things the right way is the only way.
the best workout is still the Nordic Track
/RexKramerRowBoater
sportsgal…I am even sexier in a husky sort of way
Rowing hurts. I prefer doggy-paddling in the kiddie pool for exercise.
Roman, post your email here so Sportsgal can contact you for the Jerkette column.
Sgal, I can vouch for RWH. He looks good in his own husky kinda way.
Let’s play a quick game… I spy Roman’s extra 80 EL BEES.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/rebecca_rs/2448298581/
I hear the best way to get in shape is to do a lot of blow and workout. The blow makes you lose your appetite (cutting calories) and provides you with increased energy. Ripped in no time!
I feel like you guys have absolutely zero interest in my “interview,” you just want me to do it so you can make fun of me for months on end.
@illformula - if I didn’t have a heart condition, I would so be on the coke + gym diet.
What are you going to do? Interview sportsgal once a month?
sportsgal, we would never make fun of one our 5 “real” readers
CRM, I hate to spoil the surprise, but you were already designated August Jerkette of the Month.
sportsgal…trust me..we would love to interview you…you are an important asset in the MLJ empire and you would give us a great Q rating with the ladies and all the fellas would wait with baited breath for all of your answers…don’t get skittish…it’s all good
@sportsgal: broken heart. that’s just terrible.
I just said that in my deepest Barry White Voice
Sportsgal, i think it’s worth the risk. Today would be a great day to add extremely hot conditions to the workout. Imagine the calories you would burn.
This totally sucks. CRM and Sportsgal, in their own ways, have discovered my ruse. I was just going to interview her once and then just run a completely different bimbo’s photo every month. It’s not like anyone reads this tripe to begin with.
And of course use it to make fun of her for years (not months).
/jealous that it was CRM’s idea first. fuck.
In fact, I’m making the trip to south east DC after work!
You do realize that it’s Simmons’ wife, right? She works out to stay in shape for Bill.
80! Sportsgal you are a generous woman.
Btw, I’ll Paypal 1,000 pesos to the first person that sends me a usable photo of CRM. I’m getting bored with harrassing TBL.
And I’ll make him the Jerkette for August**, per Spencer’s wishes.
**July is open, but I have hope that we gain another real, live female reader
SE? Who goes to SE anymore?
maybe we can use Hef’s female alterego Hefette
RWH, are you interested in helping me write a pilot about what your life would be like if your FUPA had the ability to speak? I envision crime fighting, some detective work, and corny one-liners from your sidekick.
I don’t have a FUPA…I am filled out well for a fat man.
So you categorically deny that you were pictured in the link above? Really? You sure you want to take it that far?
Inquest: Begun
Here’s the problem with living close to the Friendly Confines - I would much rather eat kosher dogs and drink beer at the Cubs game tonight than go to the gym and work out for an hour.
And in what world is that a problem S-Gal?
that’s where the blow would come in handy.
The problem is, I’d prefer not to look like a female Roman, so I have to resist the urge to go to the game and instead go to the fucking gym.
SG why don’t you go in the mornings?
I admire people who get up early just to go to the gym. And when I say admire, I mean laugh at.
I’ve attempted to go in the mornings, but it’s next to impossible for me to wake up that early. Early rising is not my strong suit.
Under the Lights Gonzo?
is it that time for it?
Night games are close to starting… I have nothing to do tonight, I’m bored.
This is already the 3rd time Cabrera has gone up against Beckett this season. Seems odd.
Wow…a female Roman…thrown out there like a curse word..I am actually a bit hurt..